Wisdom Words 6-14-13 Samantha LeBoeuf
Communication…..What does that word mean to you? Out of every possible thing we have as a tool in a relationship with anyone, be it professional or personal, “Communication is the Key”
It literally operates as a KEY to open doors throughout your daily life with anyone. Ask yourself 2 questions: What can I do to improve all my relationships? Is there a relationship that needs mending, or is broken?
Go back in your mind, re-tracing the words said, throughout your relationship, conversations you’ve had, and you will be able to unlock the door to the problems and the root of where and when they started and ended or what led to the relationship you could improve, and how the relationship has manifested because of this.
My sister has always taught me to be careful with my words. Of course, she was my little sister, who is now a woman, but her advice comes in handy when I am looking for answers.
First and foremost, take time to think. Make a list of the positives and negatives in the relationship. Think of your history, and be as objective as possible. Is it a relationship healthy and worth saving, if your working on a broken one, and the same method below is used for your professional relationships that are broken as well, or just need mending.
Isolate the problems in the relationship. after you’ve located the specific problems in the broken relationship, you then, can list them on paper, clearly and concisely, one by one and ask yourself, what part in this problem do I own, and what role have I played in the mistakes made, and what is my part? BE ABSOLUTELY HONEST with yourself, or this remedy will not work.
When you know what your part is, it is time to decide HOW you will initiate communication. I prefer face to face conversation, but that is not always the best avenue to take. In your heart, you will know what to do.
1. Ask permission from this person to have the conversation, as this establishes boundaries, and shows respect.
2. When you both meet, begin the conversation, laying out what you feel these particular issues are in the relationship and express your desire to mend it.
3. Then, Really LISTEN to what they are “Saying and Conveying”.
As most of us have heard, ACTIONS do speak louder than words, so their message they are conveying, will help share with you what their feelings are.
4. Paraphrase, back to them, what you’ve heard them say, and acknowledge your understanding.
5. Don’t be afraid to apologize!! “Pride” has both positive and negative meanings, and Pride will stop many of us from being able to say, 2 infamous words, that mean so much to another. “I’m Sorry”.
6. Compromise!! If that relationship was worth doing all the things I’ve suggested, isn’t it worth, meeting them in the middle?
Remember: In order to Mend, you must Bend!! Allow yourself flexibility. Your there to move towards a solution, not live in the past, with the problem.
My last suggestions? Empathize with your partner in all interaction. Make it a top priority.
You should also Know WHEN it is time to end a relationship, because, you may be willing to work for the relationship and the other person is not, or, it is a negative relationship in which your boundaries aren’t respected, and mutual love isn’t exchanged..
We must all compromise for good, healthy relationships and our lives will flourish with love, abundance, and mutually healthy, positive relationships with another. After all, isn’t that what life is all about? Our connection with others? Good communication skills equal Great relationships. SL