There are two ways to look at compromise. We first must realize why is so important to all of us to know when we need to compromise, and also when we shouldn’t.
Compromise can be tied to self-esteem.
I write daily wisdom words based on my mistakes, and others, and do my best to choose a word that has a mental message that applies to all of us. I will use myself as an example, being in an unhealthy relationship in which I allowed myself to compromise what is right for me.
We all have a mental “scale” which weighs what feels right for us, and what doesn’t. The first time we allow ourselves to compromise, what we believe in, I promise, won’t be the last. I allowed myself, in that relationship to compromise my own scale of values, and my integrity which I weigh mentally. Had I listened to my “inner voice” and valued that scale which tells me when I have crossed the line because I knew when I compromised how I should be treated, I compromised myself in the process.
I share this because I learned, after finally letting go of that relationship, how very important it is never to cross the boundaries you have and compromise what you believe in to begin with. It crushed my self-esteem, and I know now after much thought, had I never compromised the first time he stood me up for a date then talked his way back in my heart, had I ended the relationship that first time my boundaries were crossed, I could have saved myself so much pain.
I do believe something good always comes from something bad, and now I won’t compromise my values, or beliefs because I know now, I deserve to be treated with respect and dignity, and so do you. Don’t compromise your inner belief system, ever.
Another example? My fiance’ recently faced the challenge of a necessary career change. He was going to settle for a job opportunity beneath his skill level. After giving it much thought, he decided his “scale of compromise” would be crossed by doing so, and he waited and God led him to the perfect business opportunity just right for him.
However, compromise is a two way street. In a healthy relationship, IE., compromise is absolutely necessary to make a relationship work long term. In fact, compromising, after allowing yourself to empathize with your partner’s position on the issue, is a sign of great strength.
Do you know what you will compromise, and what you won’t? I think it is important to be “aware” of your specific boundaries, and weigh that scale when deciding what you will and won’t compromise in life.
Sometimes we settle for things as they are, when we shouldn’t. How do we get in these situations? By not listening to that inside voice that tells us where our boundaries are, and when we cross over them, we compromise when we shouldn’t.
Be aware of when you should compromise and when you should not. Know your morals, values and beliefs well enough to weigh each situation that comes your way, whether it is business or personal, so you can make wise decisions when to compromise and when not to. Listen to your inner voice. We all have one.
Why is this so important? Because the first time you compromise in a relationship in which your emotionally invested, when the voice inside, told you not to, this is the beginning of an avalanche of compromises! I state this from personal experience. Learn from my mistake so you won’t compromise, when the voice inside you, had you listened, told you not to. SL