Santa packed his merry sleigh,
Toys and goodies, and on his way.
He was fatter this year since he last flew,
He figured it wouldn’t hurt, a pound or two.
But when he went to get in his seat,
He found it to be quite a feat
Even with an expander belt,
He wouldn’t fit unless he’d melt.
He ended up in just his suspenders
So depressed he went on a bender.
Santa now was just plain stoned
He’d call for a lift if he could find a phone
He knew at this point he was very late,
He knew he could not just sit and wait
Miracles do happen on Christmas from heaven
When out of the sky he saw a 747.
He looked at the starry sky,
Then, in the blink of an eye
He threw up a flair
The 747 landed right there,
The pilot was thrilled to see Santa Claus,
He proceeded to fly with gifts and ???? love
Santa and the pilot made several trips
Delivering each gift with a push and lift
As they were done, the last twinkling star,
Hid behind a cloud so very far
Santa was a happy man,
He’d pulled Christmas off in a very short span.
He and the pilot had one more place to go
To drop Santa at home in the snow
He gave the pilot one last look
Telling him next year he was number 1 in his book.
Santa packed his merry sleigh,
Toys and goodies, and on his way.
He was fatter this year since he last flew,
He figured it wouldn’t hurt, a pound or two.
But when he went to get in his seat,
He found it to be quite a feat
Even with an expander belt,
He wouldn’t fit unless he’d melt.
He ended up in just his suspenders
So depressed he went on a bender.
Santa now was just plain stoned
He’d call for a lift if he could find a phone
He knew at this point he was very late,
He knew he could not just sit and wait
Miracles do happen on Christmas from heaven
When out of the sky he saw a 747.
He looked at the starry sky,
Then, in the blink of an eye
He threw up a flair
The 747 landed right there,
The pilot was thrilled to see Santa Claus,
He proceeded to fly with gifts and ???? love
Santa and the pilot made several trips
Delivering each gift with a push and lift
As they were done, the last twinkling star,
Hid behind a cloud so very far
Santa was a happy man,
He’d pulled Christmas off in a very short span.
He and the pilot had one more place to go
To drop Santa at home in the snow
He gave the pilot one last look
Telling him next year he was number 1 in his book.