“Your flaws are perfect for the heart that is meant to love you.”
I’m flawed. You’re flawed. We’re all flawed and that’s okay. If we weren’t, we wouldn’t be human beings. Being flawed is an inevitable trait since the dawn of time and will be there until all life has perished.
So why do we not proclaim it as loudly as we do our talents and skills?
One obvious thought is, why would anyone boast about their weaknesses? That in my opinion is where the problems begin in self-analysis. We look at our flaws as if they’re weaknesses.
Like I’ve talked about often about other mental health issues, it’s an issue with perception and point of view more than anything else. Flaws are not weaknesses but rather, learning curves. They help us grow and understand not only ourselves better, but those around us as well.
And as counter-intuitive as it may seem, flaws are the first steps to a better life. That’s because we only seek improvement in something when we know or admit we need it. There’s a reason why the first step of solving any problem is listed as admitting you have a problem in the first place, especially when it comes to combating addiction issues.
One of the things I started doing after a suggestion from my counselor is whenever I knowingly make a mistake, I say to myself “I’m flawed and that’s okay. I’m getting better and will continue to do so.” Doing so takes care of the first step; admission.
What comes next? What are the long-term benefits after admitting? The following advantages were compiled from various articles online by mental health experts.
- The first thing admitting your flaws helps in is softening your ego a little bit. When our egos are over-inflated, newer information, especially one that forces us to admit we’re wrong is much more difficult to process. By admitting out loud that we have our weaknesses, we’re inviting resources to come help us.
- Another advantage in admitting flaws is makes you more relatable to those around you. I remember when I first joined Twitter; I kept seeing tweets from other writers about how they just got an acceptance email from this publication or that publication, etc. Shortly after, a fellow writer and I were having a conversation about rejection emails. I was complaining about how they were bringing me down. It was then that I found out that that writer, who I considered and still do an idol of sorts, got twice as many rejections as acceptances. It’s just that they didn’t like to announce it publicly for obvious reasons. I remember how that made me feel so much better. Not the fact that my friend was getting so many rejections but the fact that I wasn’t the only one.
- Criticism doesn’t hurt as much after a little self-deprecation. If you admit a flaw to yourself first, another person doing the same isn’t as impactful because you’ve already dealt with it, at least internally.
- Many psychologists have argued that admission of flaws takes off a certain burden off of our conscience. The reason for it is that when don’t admit something, it’s as good as a lie, even to ourselves. Lies inevitably tend to weigh heavily in our minds. When we let go of a lie, no matter what the external conflicts it may bring, internally it frees us. The same psychology applies to admitting flaws. Once we admit them, we don’t have the burden of deceiving ourselves.
This is just the tip of the iceberg. As we delve deeper into psychology many such advantages will be more obvious. But the aforementioned ones are good enough to get started on the path of admitting flaws. So let’s say it together again: I’m flawed. You’re flawed. Everyone is flawed. And that’s okay.
How easily do you admit your flaws? Do you feel better after doing so? If you find it more difficult to admit, why do you think that is? Has admitting a flaw(s) ever proved to be advantageous for you? How so? Share your thoughts and experiences by commenting below on our secure servers.
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