Nothing more priceless than a Mother.  I think of my Mom and always my heart warms.  I am a very analytical person, and watch for examples subconsciously I am still learning from my mother.  She is an example her daughters and her son Carl wish to see.  She lost her daughter and yes, my sister this past year.  There is a first for everything, and sadly, this will be her first Mother’s Day without Jenny.  Jenny and my mother talked daily and remained so close despite the distance.  During 2019 and 2020, my mom visited her while my baby sister suffered with head and neck cancer, called squeamish cell carcinoma.  I hate that name and wish I could wipe it away but life and reality doesn’t work like that. 

Jenny was a beautiful mother herself, and she left behind two beautiful girls, my nieces, Luma and Isabella.  Today should be joyful, and my sister should still be here well and happy spending Mother’s Day with her daughters. 

I think of how many mothers are gone due to Covid-19, yet am still overwhelmed with grief and tears when I think of Jenny.  My mother I am sure, is having a very hard time today, but she is so strong, and will put a smile on her face and celebrate it with me, my son and daughter-in-law and Jay, my children’s dad and yes, her beautiful new great grandson, Logan James. 

Just to update you all, two baby boys arrived within 24 hours over the past week.  Technically Easton, my daughter’s beautiful boy she is a mother to, was born early evening and 10-12 hours passed when I received the news of my son and daughter-in-laws  bundle of joy having been born, Logan James.  Their birthday’s are officially one day apart but it all blurred together for me.  I knew my daughter would be okay along with baby, but couldn’t help but worry about my daughter-in-law who ended up with a medical  issue and baby one month early.  She is fine and home now with baby as of today, thank God.   

My mother would want me to o dedicate this first Mother’s Day without Jen to her and that is what I want to do.  I want everyone out there to know just how special she was in so many ways especially as a mother.  Jen had such wisdom and basically raised her girls alone.  She did it all.  She was a mother, daughter, sister, and friend to so many.  My heart bleeds for her girls today.  They don’t have a dad there to help them through.  My sister was one efficient individual.  She did it all.  I look back and wonder how she did what she did which was a miracle in itself and she did it all so well.

Her first child, a beautiful girl, Hillary, died six days prior to her third birthday.  My sister just about lost it for good, but was strong enough to love again and gave birth to two beautiful girls who she worried sick about 24-7 and loved so very much.  I won’t pretend to be able to feel my mother’s sadness or grief.  I won’t pretend to be able to feel how my nieces feel.  I can only hope with faith, love and time, we will  be close and in some way I can give to them some comfort as their Aunt. 

I think it very important to acknowledge Mother’s Day from both angles.  This would be how I feel about my own mother who I love and completely treasure and honor.  The loss still hurts too much for me, so I won’t pretend to get how she feels or my nieces pain.  I do know how sad they must feel this first Mother’s Day without her.  The loss is still too great for us all.   I wrote a poem I shared on facebook and instead of anger and blame, I choose to see this differently.  God does give us choices and I choose to remember how bright her blue eyes were and how she lives on in both my nieces in their beauty and grace.

I want to wish every mother in the world a Happy Mother’s Day and remember what is, and the good in what was.  I hope my children know my love for them.  They both amaze me is so many ways.  I want you, Mom, to make a choice to remember the happiness we all shared from very different perspectives. 

Happy Mother’s Day Mom.  There simply are NO words that can express my love for you and I am so very sorry I am short on the phone and I will do my best to try harder because life is just “too short”.  YOU are so loved MOM and still are by your baby girl.  The things in Life we can’t see hold the most beauty.  Love is my first choice.  I love you with all my heart.  Thank you so very very much, Mom.You truly make life worth living and set an example as the kind of mother I can only hope to be.  I appreciate you and treasure you and the times together we share. 

Your daughter, Samantha.  “We will remember you forever Jen and all the beauty and love you brought each of us”. HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY             “THANK YOU FOR ALL THE GIFTS YOU GIVE WE CAN’T SEE “

“Mom, thank you for showing us what being a wonderful Mother means by examples you set for us over the years”   

2021   “Happy Mothers Day Mom….I find myself wordless when I think of how much I love you”

“The examples set through actions, kindness and traditions I thank you for, though love and selflessness are devotion, you show us what it means to be a wonderful Mom, I am thankful and will always will be.  Remember, the most “beautiful things in this world are the things we can’t see” I love you so very very much to the moon and back.  Your daughter,  Samantha



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