Daily Wisdom Words



                                           ARE YOU INVOLVED WITH A SOCIOPATH?
                        I decided to write on Sociopaths don’t know much about this subject.  When we think of either, Psychopaths or Sociopaths, we think of VIOLENCE.  Not always true for Sociopaths; not true at all.  The same is true for “PSYCHOPATHS” and,  based on Current Studies, ONE out of every 25 people you meet, ONE of these people WILL BE A SOCIOPATH.

ARE YOU INVOLVED WITH A SOCIOPATH or PSYCHOPATH, and you just don’t know what it is, but something about them seems so perfect for you, you begin to think your crazy?  2 to 3% of our population deal with Psychopathy, with Non-violent tendencies.  They are BRILLIANT individuals, and are our “perfect Mirrors” showing us what we want to see, and hiding that, in ourselves we don’t.  

Sociopaths or Psychopaths with violent tendencies such as mass murderers, rapists, and serial killing with Sociopaths the most dangerous of the two when they are violent, type 1 individuals.  According to math, 1 out of 25 people walking down the street are Sociopaths.  There is also, Sociopaths who are nonviolent in nature, controlling and directing it in other areas of their life.  They are narcissists, but mostly, they are a series of fabulous actors, all played, in one role.   Crossing or wavering over boundaries that are clear to us, they find is daily habit, because they find thrill and excitement when doing so.  They are not complete monsters for they do feel some guilt and some shame, but that is it.  They feel depressed, quietly for inside, themselves, when they allow their mind to get quiet, they feel EMPTY INSIDE.

Chances are favorable you know a Sociopath, or could even be involved with one. 1 MILLION individuals are Psychopaths in America alone, and another .05% of our population approximately violent ones.   (I did this research, after being involved with one and giving my heart to him to play with for four YEARS.  When we broke up, I asked him, “What percentage of these issues between us am I responsible for, in your mind?”  His  REPLY?  “90 percent.  This left me with a better understanding of him for I knew I had given him all of me in every way, and I had to find out if I was that full of flaws.  

In order to do that, I had to understand WHY I would get involved with him in the first place. I knew this would help me let go of this.  I found,  Surprisingly, if you are vulnerable enough, one will “sniff” you out, and come to you, without you looking at all for them.  

Let us take a look at the definition in the Webster of a sociopath and a psychopath because there is not any difference to count either.  I guess Webster would have had to devote the who book explaining the different types of each, so let us go with the below explanation because they have much in common.  

These mental illnesses have one thing in common that is clear:  Both, Sociopathy, and Psychopathy, are listed in the DSM V under mental disorders known as:  Antisocial personality disorders.  They, however blend into society.  How do they do this?  They study our Behavior and how we express all Pertinent Emotions.  

Webster Definition:  One who has severe mental disorders, whose behavior is asocial.

Daily Wisdom Word Definition-1.  An individual who is incapable of true empathy, remorse, and a pathological liar.  2.  An individual who is charming and intelligent, and reckless who will break your heart, no matter what your relationship is to them.  3.  A clear “distinction” between Sociopaths and Psychopaths, and the Webster uses virtually the same description, and it is important we know the difference.

I am going to give you the A B C’s about them and since I am NOT a doctor, it is a benefit, because I will be speaking in people words, instead of medical jargon. (except when writing about research.) Why am I writing about them?  I don’t want any of you to ever get involved with one as I did.

It is scary.  Why?  These people, “blend right in with society”.  In fact, they “Blend Well”. Social Sociopaths, are charismatic, manipulative, convincing, even evil, and and they were born this way.
There are different TYPES of Psychopaths, and illicit drugs, I think, such as amphetamine based drugs,  can literally change the makeup of our brain, the frontal lobe area, (involving primitive activity, like anger and rage, FYI, so if your wondering why drug addicts commit crime, that explains part of it.)  They end up with Sociopathic tendencies.  

I have broken down just two types of Sociopaths and Psychopaths. Hopefully, after reading this, you will better understand them because chances are, at some point in your life, you will know one, know of someone else dealing with one, or find yourself involved with one as I did. 

SOCIOPATHS want love, so they find someone who will give it to them.  I gave him my trust, my respect, and my heart, and walked out of the relationship like broken glass, managing to glue myself back together with much counseling and learning all about who he was by reading the definition of a Sociopath.

 SOCIOPATHS, fall into our scenario quite easily.  In fact, if they are trying to charm you, they exhibit a heart.  The one difference between SOCIOPATHS and PSYCHOPATHS:  The capacity, if you are a family member, or someone they trust, and the relationship between you both, benefits him, he is capable of feeling small amounts of empathy, and can feel guilt, whereas PSYCHOPATHS do not.

I wrote on Neurolaw, which I think will end up in the Webster Dictionary in the years to come, and Neuroscience.  Sociopaths, if given an MRI or even Cat Scan with Contrast, show a vast amount of activity in the “FRONTAL LOBE or primitive area of our BRAIN.  The primitive area of our brain are our sexual tendencies, our aggression, and other primal instincts.  If we had a Neuro-exam, our brains would be different than theirs would be, because the “frontal lobe” is so active, and the more active, the more Sociopathic one becomes, and I believe, that it will eventually be able to distinguish between a Psychopath and a Sociopath clearly as we use more and more of Neuro research, and studies are being conducted, now.

How is this aggression displayed?  That is the BIG DIFFERENCE BETWEEN PSYCHOPATHS AND SOCIOPATHS.  Sociopaths may do petty crime, but they are usually impulsive, whereas PSYCHOPATHS are meticulous in planning, (I don’t feel we need to worry the Sociopath will murder us, but we do need to worry about their motives and them outsmarting us.)

WHY? Sociopaths are usually either ANTISOCIAL or they are a true GENIUS.  They have observed others emotions, and display and share with you, what they have LEARNED, not FELT OR ARE FEELING TOWARDS YOU.

I have always been intrigued with Psychology, and Psychiatry and wish I had finished my degree, because, after three years, I figured out what and who I was dating.  I even got engaged to him for two weeks.  I started out in the relationship meeting a charming, disarming, Physician with a Law degree as well.  I have always been attracted to one’s mind.

He was very smart, and I could feel it.  I felt he was extremely empathetic, (I had just been diagnosed with breast cancer), had RSD, and he offered to go with me to my appointments, taking a deep interest in me.  He listened and observed.  LITTLE did I know, he was doing more observing than listening.  I feel he found most people boring for he was always one step ahead of them, but because of my mental interest, I think I held his interest longer than normal.

He can date who he wants, and I no longer feel bad, that I am the one who was the victim.  It doesn’t help anyway.  I lost too much to him already, and I won’t let myself, feel as one.

THERE are two different types of Sociopaths, I will be writing about.  the first one is of the “non-violent sociopath, followed by the Violent sociopath.  Both are dangerous, but in very different ways.
I found him charming, disarming, exciting, sexual, mysterious, and deeply intelligent, but there are different forms of IQ, and emotional intelligence was not his strong suit.  He “observed” others, seeing how they acted to mimic their actions in situations requiring deep emotions.

Last, here is an ideal answer:  TWO months after breaking up, I received an email I have kept to remind myself of who he is, because they will worm their way back INTO relationships, often.

I thought, prior to opening it:  “Maybe this is finally at the very least an apology for what he had done with me, toying with my friends, family and myself, and dumping me for another niav’ soul.

It read in summation:  First, I opened its attachment.  It was his withdrawal from taking the BAR Exam or law licensing exam.  He attached this:  Thanks a whole fu..ing lot.  This is what you cost me.  That is it!!!

These are my thoughts on this subject, based off research I have done to understand why/how I got involved with a TYPE 1 Sociopath.

TYPE 1 SOCIOPATHS WITH PSYCHOPATHIC TENDENCIES, NON-VIOLENT- Type 1 sociopaths, are especially scary for their secrets hide behind secrets and those behind a locked vault.  These individuals believe, the truth is what we make it, and lying, is common place for them.  They are charming charismatic individuals, who do socialize quite often.  Not because they enjoy it, but because they know they have to in order to blend into society.  (remember, this is my take on what I have read, and based on what I absorbed, and I have created these two types, because the DSM-V has medical terms that are for others above my pay grade, but what I write is as accurate as possible.)

Type 1 Sociopaths, put their primal overdrive, towards sex, race car driving, calculated risk, manipulation, and hunting as well as learning to be good at everything. Extremists but very calm on the exterior.  

Have you ever seen someone dressed up for a “Masquerade Party”?  They are wearing a mask and you cannot see who they are.  Nonviolent sociopaths, are just this:  two people, with 1-25  or 1000 shades of gray.  They have dual personalities.  Scary?  You bet.  A “Genius” comes along approximately in 1% of the people you meet.  Most Geniuses have some form of mental illness. 

Sociopaths, most often are Geniuses, wearing a mask.  Sociopaths, are the very best “unpaid” actors we have.  Sociopaths, know what you want, before you do, and they can sense WEAKNESSES and vulnerabilities a mile away.  they are automatically attracted to that, and there is no better way to learn how to act, then to play the role, and they win the oscar with their performances.

What their interests are, begin, with a challenge.  They are captured by physical beauty, but claim they are looking for a woman beautiful inside.  They care, about the CHASE and the CONQUER.  Once that is over, it boils down to what YOU HAVE TO OFFER THEM.  Perhaps, it is a family life or atmosphere.  They are true observers, and because it is the environment they grew up in that had either warmth and love, or bad circumstances that determine how much sympathy they are able to feel.  What you and I might feel is a stab in the heart, would feel to them, like a pin prick.  That is why they are so calm, and calming on the exterior.

They are specialists, playing roles, so they know what to do to win you over, just as one would a prize.  They are very vain and TERRIFIED to get old.  These individuals will do whatever they have to to feel young, stay young, and act young, for their emotional intelligence is extremely low.  That is how and why they appear so calm.  When your involved with one, and your anxious like myself, they are great medicine:  TEMPORARILY.  He was and I believe is still extremely ill.  I pray for him often, but what I could not understand in the past, was his pleasure he seemed to take in hurting me.

The Geniuses are smart at expressing their rage in other formats beside breaking the law.  If he were to read this today, he would not feel one tinge of guilt, and if I shared who he was, I could possibly be in danger, I believe.

TYPE 2 SOCIOPATHS-ANTISOCIAL- These individuals don’t care for society, and don’t wish to put on the show.  They stick to themselves unless absolutely necessary for them to come out of the woodwork.  They can be geniuses but more often than not, they have learning disabilities.  They are quiet, well behaved children, but keep your pets away from them.  They may end up killing the cat or dog.  They show more aggression unmasked, so they are silent, perfect, quiet, until the day comes, when they shoot someone.  

I don’t wish to go into this type anymore, because I know much more about TYPE 1 Sociopaths having been involved with one.  

I thought I could change him.  Instead, he forever changed me.  I will NEVER be as trustworthy, niav’, and inviting as I was before, without getting to know the person I am talking to.  The problem with this picture, was I already had an indirect relationship with him, and I trusted him too fast.

Why have I shared this?  So that you may treat those you meet, giving them the benefit to the doubt, but always learning a little about them before doing so.  There are so many beautiful, wonderful people out there BUT, there are those out there that seem too good to be true as well. They are the ones who are sick, not you, although we all have emotional issues, and I do suffer with depression and anxiety.  If a Sociopath were to read, the weakness, I just wrote in that last sentence, they would POUNCE on it, and Play on it with me if I would let them.  (they like games)

I ended up with 1 out of the other 24, but to me, he is one in a million.  Remember:  The wisdom is always is the words, but watch actions as well, to make sure the two match..SL

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