FINALITY

OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY IS “FINALITY”.  THERE ARE THINGS WE EXPERIENCE IN A LIFETIME THAT WE CAN’T CONTROL.  WE DON’T CONTROL OTHER PEOPLE, FOR EXAMPLE.  WE CAN SET AN EXAMPLE FOR THEM BUT ULTIMATELY, IT IS THEIR CHOICE TO DECIDE IF THEY FOLLOW THAT EXAMPLE.  WE CAN GIVE ADVICE, BUT ULTIMATELY THE DECISION MADE IS IN THAT PERSON’S HANDS.  WHAT WE DO HOLD CONTROL OVER IS OUR OWN CHOICES.  WE WILL HAVE NEGATIVITY TO DEAL WITH DURING LIFE, AS WELL AS PAIN. 

WE CAN CHOOSE TO FEEL THE PAIN, AND LOOK FOR THE GOOD FOUND WITH ANOTHER BUT WE CANNOT BE FULLY RESPONSIBLE FOR THE OUTCOMES OF OUR RELATIONSHIPS.  WHETHER IT IS OUR CHILDREN, OUR FRIENDSHIPS OR EVEN OUR FUTURE, WE CAN GUIDE WHAT WHAT WE WANT TO HAPPEN, AND STILL HAVE UNEXPECTED TURBULENCE FROM OUTSIDE EVENTS WE SIMPLY HAVE NO CONTROL OVER. 

LIFE IS SHORT.  ONE OF THE EXPERIENCES WE MUST FACE IS FINALLY ACCEPTING FINALITY WHEN OTHERS ARE INVOLVED OR THEY DECIDE TO EXIT OUR LIFE.  SOMETIMES IT MUST BE US THAT ACCEPTS FINALITY.  IF A RELATIONSHIP CAUSES US PAIN AND IS UNHEALTHY, OR SOMEHOW IS HURTING US MORE THAN HELPING US IT MAY BE TIME TO ACCEPT THE FINALITY OF A SITUATION.  IT HURTS IN LIFE WHEN WE LOSE PEOPLE WE LOVE WHETHER IT BE BECAUSE THEY CHOOSE TO GO, OR GOD CALLS THEM HOME.   WE DEAL WITH A SERIES OF STAGES TO GO THROUGH ANY HEALING PROCESS.  FIRST, WE ARE IN DENIAL.  NEXT COMES ANGER.  AFTER THIS, WE FEEL IMMENSE SADNESS, AND FINALLY WE ACCEPT WHAT IS OR THE LOSS OF SOMEONE WE LOVE FROM OUR LIFE. 

WHAT WE MUST DO, IS  LET GO OF THE ANGER STAGE.  WE FEEL ANGER AND THIS HELPS GIVE US STRENGTH, OR SO WE THINK, BUT ULTIMATELY IT STOPS US FROM GETTING TO THE NEXT STAGE WE NEED TO DEAL WITH TO GET TO FINALITY OR ACCEPTANCE. ANGER OVER TIME, HURTS US MORE ANYTHING.  ANGER IS LIKE A VIRUS SPREADING IN THE BODY. ANGER CAN EAT AWAY OUR LOVE FOR OTHERS INDIRECTLY CAUSING US DAMAGE IN THE RELATIONSHIPS WE STILL HAVE IN OUR LIFE.  WE  OFTEN FEEL IT IS EASIER TO STAY IN THIS STAGE TO AVOID FEELING THE NEXT STAGE WHICH IS HURT, SADNESS AND PAIN.  THIS IS WHY IT IS HARD TO GET PAST ANGER AND MOVE ON LEARNING TO COPE WITH THE SADNESS OF LOSS OF ANY KIND. 

ONCE WE REALIZE AND FEEL THIS LOSS, IT ALLOWS US TO MOVE ON TO THE FINAL STAGE, ACCEPTANCE.  WHEN WE ACCEPT THE LOSS, WE THEN BEGIN TO HEAL.  YES, THE PAIN AND MISSING THEM WILL HURT STILL, BUT THE TIMES WE SHARED AND THE LESSONS LEARNED WE LEARN TO FOCUS ON.  WE REMAIN ULTIMATELY AT A PLACE OF ACCEPTANCE AND FINALITY. FINALITY CAN BE HARD WITH ANYTHING. 

SOMETIMES WE FEEL RELIEF WITH FINALITY, BUT MORE OFTEN THAN NOT, WE FEEL THE LOSS.  I WISH THIS WERE MORE ABOUT SOLUTIONS BUT WE MUST EXPERIENCE ANGER TO GET TO SADNESS, AND THEN ACCEPTANCE AND LETTING GO.  FINALITY WITH ANYTHING WHICH BROUGHT US HAPPINESS, HOWEVER LITTLE IT MAY HAVE BEEN, IS HARD TO ACCEPT, BUT IT IS IN ACCEPTANCE WE WILL BEGIN TO HEAL.  DO YOU HAVE A RELATIONSHIP YOU KNOW HAS REACHED ITS EXPIRATION DATE?  DO YOU FIND YOURSELF FULL OF ANGER AND SOMETIMES EVEN RAGE?  LIFE ISN’T FAIR AND SOMETIMES WE DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY WHEN A RELATIONSHIP ENDS OR TO BE HEALTHY, WE MUST LET GO OF IT. HOW DO WE HEAL?  LOVE FOR THOSE WHO ARE STILL IN OUR LIFE BECOMES ABUNDANT LIKE A VACCINE OF SORTS JUST AS HATRED IS A VIRUS.  LOVE GROWS AND FILLS OUR HEART WITH JOY INSTEAD OF OUR HEAD IN ANGER AND HATE.  PART OF LIFE JUST LIKE A BEGINNING IS AN END.  FINALITY CAN BE WHAT IS NECESSARY TO DRAW HEALTHY BOUNDARIES FOR OURSELVES EMOTIONALLY AND PSYCHOLOGICALLY.  THIS MAY MEAN LOSS, BUT IT ALSO MEANS FREEING UP SPACE WASTED IN TRYING TO CONTROL OTHERS AND THEIR ACTIONS.  DO YOU HAVE QUESTIONS?  DO YOU WANT TO KNOW THE BEST WAY TO COPE WITH A PARTICULAR SITUATION ENDING?  LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW OR A QUESTION AND YOU WILL GET A RESPONSE.  I RESPOND TO MY QUESTIONS AND COMMENTS, EVEN IF IT TAKES A FEW DAYS.  THANKS FOR READING…IF YOU HAVE HELPFUL ADVICE, LEAVE IT IN THE “JOIN THE DISCUSSION” AREA BELOW THIS POST.  THANK YOU, SAMANTHA

 

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Samantha Leboeuf-founder/daily wisdom words, LLC
Founder: Daily Wisdom Words, LLC. I love Poetry and am an Author as well.   There is a lot of meaning in the title of my book, Daily Wisdom Words, Volume l. My previous experience is in Sales and Marketing. Previously, I was in charge of Development through the Marketing and Sales of New Homes' in new home communities for close to 20 years.  I was a licensed Real Estate Broker selling/listing homes in the Colorado market.  While doing this, I hosted a cable network show called, "From Trees to Keys", my portion for Colorado Living Inc.. I enjoyed creating interview questions, working for Developers of New Home Communities, hosting Live on actual construction sites, describing and displaying on television camera various stages of construction as the home was built from start to finish. I interviewed various land developers, New Home Builders, Real Estate Brokers, and other people in the Real Estate Business for one year. Previous Experience: I was licensed through the "Securities and Exchange Commission" as a Principal for Limited Partnerships and sold them as well. I held a Series 22, 63, as well as License, to manage a brokerage firm called a series 39. I enjoyed running a small branch office of an Oil and Gas Company in Colorado for approximately one year. Hobbies: I have always loved Poetry and Writing.  I was declared "Permanently Disabled" due to Breast Cancer and CRPS-(Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome).  I began focusing on my writing. I volunteered for an online poetry community,  "Realistic Poetry" for approximately six months. I decided to start Daily Wisdom Words, LLC after volunteering for an online poetry community and thinking of ways that I would improve this concept and offer something for every KIND of #Writer:  Authors, Bloggers, Poets, Songwriters, Original Quote Creatives, and short story writers. I have two grown children, a son, 33, and a daughter 31,  who lives in Idaho with her husband. They have a son, my first grandchild who will be three years old, soon!  They welcomed their second child, Easton Jay into the world, 5/4//2021. Updates are necessary as my son is now married to my lovely daughter-in-law who is awesome.  She just gave birth to their first son on 5/5/2021, who is so beautiful having the name Logan James Leboeuf. This is her and my son's first child.  Hard to believe their child has a birthday one day ahead of my daughter and son-in-law's second child, Little E.  So exciting!!  I love children! Thanks so much for reading!  We humbly love this community and the members who are part of it. We think of ourselves as a family, and every member makes up part of it.  Please view our website, dailywisdomwords.com fully as it is constantly changing!!  We are always adding new prompts, and new content, and are so very proud to be debuting with our first podcast, "Daily Wisdom Words Podcast."  Episode #101 with Dr. Dream, Kelly Sullivan Walden.  She will be our first guest.  Please watch as it airs 6/12/2021 June 12, 2021 9:00 am pacific time.  Thank you in advance if you are new to daily wisdom words, and welcome to the family. Samantha LeBoeuf
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2 months ago

Dealing with loss is different for each person. Just as each loss has a different grieving process. A parent who dies sudden, a child will grieve one way. The spouse another. People who lost children grieve” personally”, not a pain like losing my dad at 15, it is something a person can’t quite understand unless they have been there, because a part of yourself dies too. If a family is strong enough they hold each other. The days will get harder before they get better. Everything you see or hear reminds you. And that’s ok. Pain will never go away… Read more »

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