self-esteem

EMOTIONAL AND ABUSE

by

Have you heard of the term ’emotional abuse’? It may some sound weird to you but it does exist in our present age and time. You may not know by the name but you definitely have experienced it one way or another.

I came across it today while driving to the immigration office situated in Lagos State, Nigeria. It was boldly inked on a placard that was meant to sensitize every passerby and I want to believe that it is working.

Let’s cut down to the chase. I’ll start by defining the emotional abuse. Based on my research and findings I have this to say about the term emotional abuse: it is act of overpowering one verbally by means of insults, sarcastic remarks, threats, and control. 

I have my story to tell and I am sure you have yours as well. Let us talk about it on Daily Wisdom Words Picture Writing Exercise. Yes, let’s talk about it on Daily Wisdom Words Picture Writing Exercise.

Don’t be scared. No one will bite. I am ABUH MONDAY ENEOJO.  I will be your host.

  • See picture
  • Compose a poem inspired by picture with words in the title, emotional and abuse.
  • Use #DWWPWE
  • Share with us via comment box below.

Related article:

How to Recognize the Signs of Mental and Emotional Abuse

 

 

YOU CAN DO ANYHTING BY SIA

by

I can just start this prompt by saying you can do anything but you may have every right to say that I am wrong since I am not the first person to have uttered such a statement. Some may say that the aforementioned statement is hackneyed. Yes. It is hackneyed but still potent. I will leave you to it.

  • Listen to song

  • Compose a poem inspired by the song
  • Use #DWWMP
  • Share with us

Remember, this is Daily Wisdom Words Music Prompt. I am Abuh Monday Eneojo. I will be your host. It doesn’t count if you do not invite someone to join the prompt. Join the prompt.

EPISODE 10 OF DAILY WISDOM WORDS PODCAST AIRS TODAY. DO NOT MISS IT.

 

 

PRINCIPLES DO WE COMPROMISE THEM?

by

DO WE COMPROMISE OUR PRINCIPLES?  WHAT EXACTLY DO THEY MEAN AND HOW IMPORTANT ARE THEY TO US?  SOMETIMES, HOW IMPORTANT PRINCIPLES ARE TO US, DETERMINE HOW IMPORTANT IT IS WE TO US TO HAVE OUR OWN VALUES.  PRINCIPLES ARE THE WHOLE BASIS OF WHO WE ARE AND WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO US IN OUR OWN LIVES.  “PRINCIPLES ARE SOMETHING WE SHOULD NEVER COMPROMISE.”  I  FEEL STRONGLY ABOUT THIS BECAUSE I KNOW IN MY PAST WHENEVER I HAVE COME EVEN CLOSE TO COMPROMISING MY OWN PRINCIPLES, OR, IN SOME CASES, DECIDED TO IGNORE THEM COMPLETELY IS WHEN I HAVE FELT THE WORST ABOUT MYSELF. 

I FELT FULL OF GUILT AND BETRAYAL NOT TOWARDS OTHERS BUT TOWARDS MYSELF.  THE PRINCIPLES WE GROW UP FORMING,  ARE WHAT THIS REGIMENTATION IS PARTLY BASED ON. ANOTHER REASON WHICH WE DEVELOP PRINCIPLES COMES FROM WHAT WE ARE TAUGHT IS RIGHT OR WRONG AND IF WE SAW OUR PARENTAL FIGURE FOLLOWING THE RULES THEY ARE TEACHING.   

WHAT WE LEARN FROM THE LEADERS IN OUR CHILDHOOD ON A DAY TO DAY BASIS IF IT IS NOT JUST WORDS, BUT THE ACTIONS OF THE PARENTS REFLECT WHAT THEY WANT OUR PRINCIPLES TO BE. IS ONE PART OF HOW OUR PRINCIPLES ARE DETERMINED.  THE OTHER HALF OF WHAT DETERMINES OUR PERSONAL PRINCIPLES IS OUR PERSONALITY STAMPED IN WHO WE ARE.  I HAVE HAD FRIENDS THAT HAVE ALSO INFLUENCED MY PRINCIPLES.  SOME FRIENDS, THE FRIENDS I ADMIRED, SET SOME OF THE EXAMPLES I PERCEIVED POSITIVELY.  THOSE PRINCIPLES SHAPED MY PRINCIPLES  THAT STUCK MORE SO IN MY TEENAGE YEARS.  I WOULD OFTEN FIND MYSELF CONSCIOUSLY JUDGING THESE INDIVIDUALS AFTER ANALYZING THEIR PRINCIPLES. 

I  SHOULD HAVE BEEN MORE INDEPENDENT DEVELOPING MY PRINCIPLES IN MY TEENAGE YEARS WHICH ARE THE FORMATIVE YEARS I BELIEVE OUR PRINCIPLES STICK.  I FOUND MYSELF INSTEAD,  ASSESSING OTHERS TO DETERMINE WHAT I LIKED OR DID NOT LIKE ABOUT MY BELIEFS INCLUDING LOOKING AT MY OLDER SIBLINGS.  JUDGEMENT SHOULD BE THEIR OWN  FOR THEIR MORALS AND VALUES WHICH I BELIEVE ULTIMATELY FORM OUR PRINCIPLES. I PERSONALLY HOWEVER, DETERMINED WHAT I BELIEVED IN BY WATCHING OTHERS, WHAT THEY DID WRONG OR RIGHT IN MY BOOK AND LOOKED AT THEIR MISTAKES AND ACCOMPLISHMENTS INSTEAD OF MY OWN.  I THINK THIS IS BECAUSE I LACKED SELF-CONFIDENCE IN HIGH SCHOOL AND MY TEENAGE YEARS GROWING UP.  IF MY FRIENDS WERE SOMEONE WHO EXERCISED BEHAVIOR THAT I JUDGED AS RIGHT OR WRONG, I DEVELOPED A PRINCIPLE FROM THEIR EXPERIENCE.  MY PERSPECTIVE WAS DETERMINED THROUGH THE PEOPLE I ADMIRED.  I COULD SEE HOWEVER, THEIR PRINCIPLES WERE DEVELOPED FROM THEIR OWN MISTAKES AND ACCOMPLISHMENTS, NOT BY WATCHING ANOTHER PERSON DECIDE THEIR PRINCIPLES WERE FROM WHAT THEY EXPERIENCED.  I LATER IN LIFE IN MY COLLEGE YEARS GAINED ENOUGH CONFIDENCE TO DECIDE MY BELIEF SYSTEM THROUGH MY OWN MISTAKES.  IT IS OUR BELIEF SYSTEM THAT ULTIMATELY DETERMINES OUR PERSONAL PRINCIPLES.  A BELIEF SYSTEM CAN BE SO STRONG, IT CAN CAUSE SOME INDIVIDUALS TO SEARCH FOR THE SAME BELIEF SYSTEM IN OTHERS, AND UNTIL THEY FIND OTHERS WHOSE BELIEFS ARE SIMILAR, THEY CONTINUE TO BE LONERS.  WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT EITHER THROUGH OUR BELIEF SYSTEMS AND EXPERIENCES AND OUR PRINCIPLES.  I THINK WHEN WE FIND OURSELVES COMPROMISING THOSE BELIEFS AND PRINCIPLES, WE BEGIN TO COMPROMISE OUR OWN BELIEFS.  WHEN WE COMPROMISE OUR OWN BELIEVES, WE ARE ULTIMATELY NOT HAPPY WITH WHAT WE ARE DOING AND HOW THIS BEHAVIOR REFLECTS ON US.  WE WEAR OUR NEW ACTIONS LIKE WRINKLED CLOTHES, CHANGE US TEMPORARILY BUT NOT PERMANENTLY.  TO END WITH, WHAT DO I THINK ABOUT THE ORIGINAL QUESTION WHICH WAS, “DO WE COMPROMISE OUR PRINCIPLES?”  WE ARE ULTIMATELY UNHAPPY WITH WHO WE START TO BECOME.  THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING!  SAMANTHA/DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM

Do you belong to an online writer’s community?  I recommend this website to anyone who is a writer of any kind.  In order to accomplish the right outcome when we are writing with purpose such as authoring a book, or publishing poetry, it is crucial we have the right tools to be as successful as possible.  I believe dailywisdomwords.com has the tools and then also we continue to update and add new tools for you.  For ten dollars and no monthly dues, I recommend anyone who writes or is a creative should join whether it be to enhance your career or to enhance your social life.  (see our reviews on google).  Check out our book reviews which you get published on our website, and link it to amazon.  In fact, now is a great time to check us out while you are already on our website, where you would sign up:  dailywisdomwords.com. you will be very happy you did!

WORTHINESS

by

WORTHINESS IS A VALUABLE DAILY WISDOM WORD.  I DON’T MEAN THIS AS A PUN EITHER.  WORTHINESS IS SOMETHING IMPORTANT WE FEEL INSIDE THAT CAN AFFECT WHAT WE FEEL WE ARE WORTHY OF WHETHER THAT BE GOOD OR BAD.  IF WE DON’T FEEL WE ARE WORTHY OF GOOD THINGS AND GOOD PEOPLE IN OUR LIVES, WE WON’T ATTRACT THE GOOD THINGS AND GOOD PEOPLE BECAUSE WE FEEL WE DON’T DESERVE THEM.  PERHAPS THAT EXPLAINS WHY SELF-ESTEEM AND SELF-WORTH ARE BOTH IMPORTANT WHEN DETERMINING WORTHINESS.  

IF WE FEEL WE AREN’T WORTHY OF SOMETHING OR SOMEONE GOOD, THIS IS FELT SOMETIMES WHEN WE FEEL GUILTY ABOUT SOMETHING WE VIEW AS BAD WE HAVE DONE SUCH AS HURTING ANOTHER PERSON OR A FORM OF SELF-PUNISHMENT.  THIS IS WHEN WE SEE WORTHINESS TAKE ON SUCH BEHAVIOR AS “CUTTING OURSELVES” OR SELF PUNISHMENT WHICH HARMS US IN SOME WAY. 

IF WE ARE NOT HURTING OURSELVES WITH CUTTING, OR HARMFUL EATING DISORDERS, THEN WE GENERALLY FIND WE PUNISH OURSELVES BY PICKING. PEOPLE WE FEEL WE ARE WORTHY OF.  IF OUR SELF-WORTH OR WORTHINESS IS AFFECTED, THAN SO ARE THE PEOPLE WE CHOOSE TO BE AROUND AND THE QUALITY OF THESE INDIVIDUALS.  LET US TAKE A LOOK AT WORTHINESS IN OUR WEBSTER DICTIONARY. 

WEBSTER DICTIONARY MEANING OF WORTHINESS-1.  THE QUALITY OF BEING GOOD ENOUGH, SUITABILITY.  2.  THE QUALITY OF DESERVING RESPECT OR ATTENTION.

DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION OF WORTHINESS-1.  A QUALITY WHICH DETERMINES WHAT WE VIEW AS WORTHY INCLUDING OURSELVES AND OTHERS.  WORTHINESS CAN BE A MAKE OR BREAK QUALITY BECAUSE IT FACTORS IN HOW WE TREAT OTHERS AND MORESO, OURSELVES. 

WORTHINESS IS SOMETHING THAT MAY REQUIRE GETTING PROFESSIONAL HELP FOR TO DIG IN AND FIND OUT WHY WE DON’T FEEL WORTHY OR PERHAPS WE FEEL TOO WORTHY WHICH CAN HAVE THE OPPOSITE REACTION FROM OURSELVES.  IF WE FEEL OUR SELF-WORTH IS MORESO THAN ANOTHER, WE MAY TREAT OTHER INDIVIDUALS WITH LITTLE OR NO RESPECT WHEN WE FEEL IN SOME WAY WE ARE BETTER THAN THEM.  THIS CAN ALSO BE A PROBLEM WE WON’T FULLY GET TO THE BOTTOM OF WITHOUT MUCH SELF-EXAMINATION.  WE DO NEED TO FOCUS ON GETTING THE PROFESSIONAL HELP WE NEED TO GET TO THE ROOT OF THE PROBLEM IF WE FIND OURSELVES FEELING LESS THAN OR MORE THAN.  AGAIN, BALANCE AND EQUALITY OF OURSELVES WITHOUT THE NEED TO COMPARE OURSELVES TO OTHERS, ARE KEY IN DEVELOPING HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS.  EVERYTHING NEEDS AN OUTLET AND THAT INCLUDES OUR WORTHINESS WHICH IS WHY WE DO SEE SOME EATING/CUTTING DISORDERS WHICH IS A FORM OF SELF-PUNISHMENT WHEN WE DON’T FEEL WORTHY OR PERHAPS FEEL GUILTY WHEN WE MISTREAT OTHERS, SO WE MISTREAT OURSELVES TO BALANCE THIS FEELING OUT, OFTEN TIMES IN AN UNHEALTHY MANNER.  THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING ABOUT WORTHINESS TODAY.  SAMANTHA LEBOEUF/DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM

DO YOU WANT TO BE A PART OF SOMETHING BIGGER THAN JUST YOU?  JOIN DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM TODAY.  DAILY WISDOM WORDS IS A WEBSITE DEVELOPED SPECIFICALLY WRITERS.  THIS INCLUDES AUTHORS, POETS, SONGWRITERS, SHORT STORY WRITERS, AND SO MUCH MORE.  THERE IS A SIGN-UP FEE OF $10, WHICH IS $5 TO JOIN AND AN ADDITIONAL $5 FOR YOUR FIRST MONTH DUES.  DUES ARE FIVE DOLLARS PER MONTH BUT WELL WORTH IT.  WE HAVE WRITING EXERCISES DISGUISED AS LIVE PROMPTS, POETRY, WRITING PROMPTS, POETRY CONTENTS, AUTHOR AND POET INTERVIEWS, BOOK REVIEWS, ONLINE STORE, AND SO MUCH MORE.  VISIT OUR WEBSITE NOW AND SIGN UP TODAY.  IT’S THE BEGINNING OF A NEW YEAR.  MAKE A RESOLUTION TO BECOME A BETTER WRITER.  WE WILL HELP YOU BY BEING YOUR CATALYST TO ELEVATE YOUR WRITING SKILLS.  THANKS!

ORIGINALITY

by

WE ARE ALL CREATIVE AND GIFTED WITH ORIGINALITY.  THERE IS ONLY ONE “YOU” IN THIS ENTIRE WORLD.  I Find it fascinating that we are all different, original and unique. Your  originality is seen sometimes visual.  You look different than everyone else.  You are special and unique.  I am going to take this one step further.  Who we are is divided into three parts.  Our soul, mind and body.  Each of these qualities are original.  We all have periods in life when our originality needs to shine, and it feels as if it doesn’t. 

We don’t realize we will stand out from others not by coloring our hair pink, or dressing with clothing that stands out or piercing our tongue.  We stand out when we allow our soul to shine.  We stand out where it counts.  We speak our opinion expressing our voice.  This in and of itself is originality within yourself.  If you want to dye your hair pink, or  get piercings, or tattoos go for it.  My point in bringing it up is we do not need these things to be original.  We are born original.  If you decide to get a piercing, dye your hair green, do it because you like it! 

This is a reason to definitely go for those options “if it is simply because you like it”.  If you do something to change who you are even if it is to better yourself, building on your own foundation, that is awesome.  Never compromise your originality to be someone else’s idea of who you should be or change yourself for others.  We lose some of our originality when we try to “fit in”. Your originality is the one thing that is who you are and yours alone.  I see us making decisions to be or do someone that we are not, making decisions that  make ourselves stand out.  Let us take a peak at the meaning of originality in our Webster Dictionary and the daily wisdom word definition. 

Webster Definition of originality-1.  The ability to think independently and creatively. 

Daily Wisdom Word Definition-1.  the core of our being or soul.  

This is not why you should be doing whatever it is you feel will make you fit in with a friend, a boyfriend, or a whole circle of friends.  Real self-confidence is found in originality that is internal and this originates from your core.  It shows in your personality, your actions, and who you are.  Don’t give your originality up for anyone.  Do not change for others to “make things work”.  Inside we need to remember we are special in and of ourselves and to change this for someone else is simply not worth the sacrifice we would be making with our originality.  If you are working on behavior “together” looking for a middle ground, this is not compromising your originality.  It is your inner strength and heart wanting to compromise to make a relationship work because it is worth it and is done with your partner who modifies some things for you as well.   Thanks so much for reading about “originality” today.  I hope something in this writing touches you in some way.  If it does, please share beneath this post and “join the discussion”.   

Thanks for reading, Samantha LeBoeuf

 

BETTER BY MYSELF BY HEY VIOLET

by

I know what is going through your head right now. “Is Monday going through some emotional downpour?” I guess the answer is no. I actually stumbled on the song on Youtube after searching for a good song for the prompt on the internet.

It may sound funny but trust me, many people go through mind blowing things in life and these things that i have no knowledge of has the very ability to destroy them instantly. This the reason why many are plagued with high blood pressure, stroke, dementia, ulcer, and several other ailment due to long hours of solitude and deep thoughts of how they could have done it better, leave it be or said something to alter it.

I have asked myself many times if there was a way to stop…when i mean stop, i am intentionally talking about putting an end to heart and head aches. Yes! there is a way to stop it- you’ll hear of it in the song that is featured on the prompt today.

The solution may not be appealing to you but it works. And like every man made solution, it has loop holes.

SHOUT TO @reeniereid1 AND HER DAUGHTER WHO IS CURRENTLY FIGHTING. JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT WE ARE IN THE FIGHT TOGETHER. GET WELL SOON!

Let’s go on with the prompt;

  • Listen to the song above
  • Compose a poem inspired by song
  • Share with us via comment box below

Check out the lyrics to the song below for poetic guidance….HAPPY WORLD TOURISM DAY!

LYRICS OF BETTER BY MYSELF BY HEY VIOLET

There may be something in the water
Over here in California’s
Got me feeling like I’m better off alone
Maybe it’s the way you used me
Watered down my love, abused me
And you always criticized me on the phone
Ooh, ah
Would you kill me if I told you
That I never wanna speak to you
‘Cause when I’m on my own, I feel alive
And there’s nothing wrong with crying
But my empathy is dying
‘Cause we never were that good, we’d always fight
I’m better by myself (self)
I’m better when there’s no you in my life
I’m better by myself (better by myself, better by myself)
I’m better by myself (better by myself, better by myself)
You’re no good for my health (better by myself, better by myself)
I’m better by myself (better by myself, better by myself)
Everything you do just wears me down
It’s getting old, I’m trying to run
It feels like you’re just wasting me away
When you choose to terrorize me
Any confidence inside me dies
You suffocate me with the things you say…

 

HAPPY BY WANDE

by

LYRICS

I just wanna feel elevated, yeah
Wake up in the morning, say goodbye to mourning
Wanna feel that levitation, yeah
Be on cloud nine, feel like I’m flying
But I’m in this situation, yeah
Inner me is crying, outer me is dying
Happiness and imitation, yeah
Heard you speak about joy and I want an invitation
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Something inside, yeah, the inner me
Longs just to live set free
I’ve been torn down, I got all this pain
Feel like I’m locked in chains
Hurting so badly
I just wanna be so happy
Lord I need you, please come grab me
‘Cause I just wanna be
Wanna be, yeah
(I just wanna be happy) hey
(You just wanna be happy) yeah
I wanna be… oh (you just wanna be happy)
Hey (happy, so happy)
So help me be, yeah (I just wanna be happy)
Hey (you just wanna be happy)
I wanna be… oh (you just wanna be happy)
Hey (happy, so happy)
But what does that mean, yeah?
I need that happiness that comes from above
Like it’s deeper than the feeling we
Receive from all the things that we have
I got a joy that lasts, yeah, it’s never leaving so
I still feel content when things don’t go the way I’m thinking, oh
The way we feeling so deceiving, you ain’t even know
Follow your heart, you might make the wrong choice
People yelling but you always got that still small voice
Got peace, never drive me insane, always staying the same
Something inside, yeah, the inner me
Longs just to live set free (yeah)
I’ve been torn down, I got all this pain
Feel like I’m locked in chains (yeah)
Hurting so badly
I just wanna be so happy (yeah)
Lord, I need you, please come grab me
‘Cause I just wanna be
Wanna be, yeah
(I just wanna be happy) hey
(You just wanna be happy) yeah
I wanna be… oh (you just wanna be happy)
Hey (happy, so happy)
So help me be, yeah (I just wanna be happy)
Hey (you just wanna be happy)
I wanna be… oh (you just wanna be happy)
Hey (happy, so happy)
But what does that mean, yeah?
____________________________________________________________________________

Hey,
Do you know that happiness is key in your life no matter the circumstance or status quo?
I think you already know that. So, i’ll quickly run into the business of the day.
Welcome to DWW MUSIC PROMPT. I’d like everyone to;
-Listen to song
-Compose a poem inspired by song
-Share with us
DON’T FORGET. YOU CAN BE PART OF THIS GREAT FAMILY FOR JUST $10. GIVE A DONATION TODAY!

 

 

 

Be The Hero

by


THIS ARTICLE ENTITLED, “BE THE HERO”, IS BY DR.SHANNI DOVER

 

Hello all. Today I am submitting this, my first post on DailyWisdomWords.com. I am excited to have the opportunity to reach out to others.

For this first entry, I will discuss ‘being the hero of your own life story’. Joseph Campbell is credited with the quote:

“You are the hero of your own story.”

Simply put, this means that you and you alone define your life. Through faith in yourself, you decide who and what you will be.

Therefore, it stands to reason that we have the power to be a hero if we choose. With each challenge, and mistake, we can rise to the occasion and conquer the shadows. Those who see only our mistakes may view us as failures, but this far from the truth. Mistakes are part of everyone’s life, and how we face adversity is what truly helps to define us.

Thus, by believing in ourselves and accepting both the good and bad, we can choose to embrace the pain and reinvent ourselves. Consequently, we can grow  and learn as a result of the trials we face, and subsequently become better human beings. By being the hero of your own life story, you validate your experiences and you help to define your existence. Furthermore, by working towards self understanding, we open a door to our true selves: the hero within. This is more than mere survival; this is a path towards thriving in your life.

 

A Positive Choice

Remember that one of your choices is to maintain a positive countenance in the face of heartbreaks. Our tolerance for life’s ambiguity is key to our growth, both intellectually and emotionally. By practicing positivity, you can look at your life with all its ups and downs without judging yourself too harshly.

Additionally, being the hero allows for your internal structures/schemes to be altered. Very much the way steel is tempered by fire, your seeming losses can be construed as learning opportunities…a means to your personal growth.

“Experience: that most brutal teacher. But you learn, my God do you learn.”

-William Nicholson, 1948

Beyond the personal empowerment that can be gained by reframing your own definition of success, your life can be a shining example to others as they traverse life’s labyrinth.

As a result, your life also allows you to be the hero of someone else’s story, given that you are born with a wellspring of strength and love. Every act of kindness, whether that be a smile or a hand held tightly, can serve to uplift others.

Life is love: sharing love, being love…this is your heroic path. The gift of life is immeasurable and unlike any other gift you could receive. By being a hero, you show others that they too can be heroes in their own lives and perhaps in the life of others.

“What I like about experience is that it is such an honest thing… You may have deceived yourself, but experience is not trying to deceive you. The universe rings true wherever you fairly test it.”

-C.S. Lewis

 

Next week, Sunday at 3:00, I will discuss ways in which we can become the hero in our lives, as well as in the lives of others. Please feel free to offer your feedback, e.g., was this of value to you? Until then, dear Reader, I remain your friend.

 

THIS ARTICLE ENTITLED, “BE THE HERO” , IS BY DR.SHANNI DOVER

INSECURITIES

by

Do you feel your an insecure person?  If you do, this post is for you.  We will go into what causes insecurities and how important it is to recognize and isolate where they are coming from.  We will also take a look at the exact meaning of the word, insecurities in the Webster Dictionary, and assign a daily wisdom word meaning that is most relevant to this post.  Let us first take a look at the meaning of insecurities from our Webster Dictionary.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Webster Dictionary Meaning of Insecurities-1.  Uncertainty about oneself;  Lack of  Confidence and feeling inadequate.

Daily Wisdom Words Definition of Insecurities-1.  believing yourself to be, “less than you are”.

Our insecurities are:  not feeling secure with yourself and what you stand for, who your really are, and who you believe yourself to be.  I Don’t mistake insecurities with facts.  They are two opposite things, much of the time.  Also, don’t mistake what makes you insecure, is something you can always change.  The key to overcoming insecurities, is the changes you make in who you believe yourself to be.  Who you are, then changes to match the truth in who you become.  

According to Melanie Greenberg PH.D., there are three main components we can attribute our insecurities to:

1.  Insecurity based on recent rejection.  2.  Lack of Confidence due to social anxiety  3.  Insecurity driven by perfectionism.  

Issue #1.  People, even the ones with the most self-confidence, go through times of insecurity when rejection from others are involved that they care about.  The strongest reason for this type of insecurity is cause from a  love break-up.  Some suggestions overcoming this type of insecurity, according to this article by Ms. Greenberg, PH.D., is to 1.  Give yourself time to heal . 2.  Get out and engage with life.  3.  reach out to friends and family for support . 4.  Get feedback from people you trust  5.  Persevere and keep moving towards your goals  6.  Be willing to try a different strategy if necessary.

Issue 2.  Lack of confidence  because of social anxiety.  The best way to work on this kind of insecurity is, 1. Take back your inner critic . 2.  Prepare in advance. 3.  Don’t allow yourself to avoid social situations  

Issue #3.  Having an expectation for yourself to be perfect .  How can you fix this?  1.  Try to evaluate yourself on the things you are in control of . 2.  Think about how much difference it really would make if your work were 10 percent better

My Advice:  Insecurities are best fighting facts for facts.  For us to be feeling insecure, there is always much more going on subconsciously than we realize.  Stop getting hung up on a low opinion of yourself, and when you find your thinking is stinking, STOP!.  Insecurities based on perfectionism have to start somewhere.  They tend to start with our own definition of what that perfectionism is. Change your definition of Perfect!!  When you’ve been rejected by someone you cared about, this can be the hardest cause and development of insecurity.  

What can you do to counter this?  Wipe the slate clean.  Start over.  Like a home that has to be rebuilt after being destroyed, to build it back, you start as you did in the beginning:  with a cleared area of land.  This is the same with our insecurities that have developed due to love recognition.  

The most important piece of advice I can share with you is to stop determining your value based off of other’s opinions of you.  Only give the opinions you have of yourself credence.  Why is this so important?  The values and beliefs you have of yourself, you can change!  WE CANNOT CONTROL/CHANGE OTHER PEOPLE!!  We can however, change ourselves.  Give yourself an honest assessment of areas in which you feel you would like to improve.  Write these things down in order of priority and work on them, one at a time.  Make sure to have a “Confidence List” beside you as you work on your issues.  This is a list, created by you, of what you believe yourself to be good at, good for, and things that establish self-good.  

Insecurities are one of the hardest things to deal with.  Simply remember:  You have the power to change them.  If your not putting in the effort to change your insecurities, perhaps they are not as important to you as they should be.  I hope this all has helped you and thanks so much for reading about insecurities today!  Please scroll down to the bottom of this post where it says, “Join the Discussion” , and leave a comment, poem or quote about  “insecurities”.  Samantha Leboeuf/DWW Community

**********************************************************************************************************************

WHAT DOES A DAILY WISDOM WORDS MEMBERSHIP INCLUDE AND HOW MUCH IS IT?

check out our website at: dailywisdomwords.com

With a 30 page Website, Daily Wisdom Words is a Writer’s Paradise Website, for ALL of the writing community, and just $10 to Join for a lifetime!

Authors, Poets, Songwriters, and Bloggers can all benefit for being part of this community! Quickly, I will go over some of the highlights of joining Daily Wisdom Words.  1.  Daily Wisdom Words Blog, (what you’ve just been reading.) . published Monday, Wednesday and Friday.  2.  Neel’s Wisdomology, a page for quotes, along with Neels personal suggestions, as well as a poem he crafts.  He then asks you some questions:  Scroll down beneath his post, on our website, dailywisdomwords.com, to the “Join the discussion, area”.  Participate!  You gain the advantages in actively participating and meet other members.  3.  Picture Poetry-Mon-Friday hosted live with Ace.  Our picture poetry page is one of our most popular parts of our website.  Everyday, from 9:00am -4:00pm Ace is available to comment on your poem which you create based on the picture Ace provides, and incorporate the two words he provides into the poem.  4.  Shirley’s Past and Present Wise Poets-Articles are published by 9:00-11:00 am EST. every Saturday, and are so interesting, giving you fascinating facts about Famous Poets!  You will learn so much, and Shirley is available for your comments/questions Saturday throughout the day as well.  5.  Community Writing Page, also known as “Community Corner”.  This page is designed for all members to do with, as they wish, by publishing poetry to share with others, short stories, and quotes, used by all writers.  Authors, this is a great place for you to share a blurb about your “NEW Book Release”, what the books about, and a link.  6.  Personal Portfolio Page, one given to each members.  This page has been formatted for your profile, uploading links, photos, history, brief resume of who you are.  More importantly, you have the option to send out friend requests, receive them from other members in the community with individuals who hold the same interests as you.  I have made some of the best friends here on our website. and, 7.  DWW MUSIC PROMPT every Saturday and Sunday hosted from 9:00am to 3:00pm by Monday ABuh!  A very popular song is picked, and played on the website.  You listen to the song, scroll down beneath its lyrics, and write a poem about it! Daily Wisdom Words is a Family oriented community, and we would love to have you join for just $10 for a lifetime membership!! One of the biggest benefits of each daily wisdom words webpage on our website, is that a button is right there for you to push on every post you make to repost on twitter, facebook, linkedin or Reddit, so with this option, we ask all of you to do your writing on the website and tweet or send out to FB, with the click of a button!  NEW:  Available to Members only-Wise advice, a counseling program with myself and Neel.  You not only can request advice, but you can request for it privately or publicly, by email or phone, and pick myself or Neel to be your Life Coach/Listener.  We are not licensed counselors, but feel we have much to offer based on wisdom gained from mistakes we learned from….

We also offer inexpensive book reviews, a $50 special for a full book review, which is published in two places on the website, (dailywisdomwords.com/wise-reviews) and our online library.  Join today!  We want our family to include you!  Isn’t it time to make a change?  The truth is you would not have read this far unless you already knew this…….The Daily Wisdom Words Team

 

 

‘

 

.

 

COMPARISONS

by

What are personal comparisons with another?  Before I go any further, let us take a look at the meaning of comparisons from our Webster Dictionary.

Comparisons-1.  the act or instance of comparing . 2.  The quality of being similar or equivalent

Daily Wisdom Word Definition of Comparisons-Measuring your self-worth with that of another.  Equivalating something you can do to the ability of another.

Comparisons are easy to make.  When we are running a race, sometimes we will look behind us to see how close the other racers are to us.  This is the art of comparing.  Comparisons are often made out of insecurity.  We should ideally measure ourselves up with our past abilities at the same thing and see if were getting better at whatever the challenge is.

Too often, this is not the case.  We compare ourselves to others and their abilities instead.  This is often not productive and can lead us feeling even more insecure with our own abilities.  We need to use the measuring stick of how we are doing compared to the last performance we personally have had to see if there is improvement.  Comparing ourselves to others brings us to a whole new standard of thinking and we find, we are always trying to measure up to others.

This is actually more common than you might think to do this.  Comparing ourselves to others is what our first instinct is to do to see if we are doing better at something, but that doesn’t make it the right way to do things or to improve.  It often leads to insecurities with ourselves.

We all have done it.  We have looked over our shoulders to see if the other racers are moving ahead, but this is not a productive thing to do and will almost always lead to disappointment.  Try measuring yourself against your previous run time on the track.  This way, you truly will get better at whatever it is your trying to achieve.  Thanks so much for reading about comparisons today.

Have a beautiful and blessed day.

Samantha