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DECEIT “WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU ARE DECEIVED”

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Our daily wisdom word is deceit today.  Deceit, especially when the deceit you become aware of comes from someone you love who has deceived you, it is hard to deal with.  Sadly when we are deceived, especially when it is a loved one, will bring so many emotions to the surface.  First we doubt who the person is, and then we doubt ourselves and our judgement.  It also affects the trust in a relationship.  It could come from anyone you love. 

Many of us have secrets that would have a rippling effect on others, so we keep these secrets to ourselves.  When the secret comes out and it often does, the person you did not share the secret with IS HURT.   If the secret is related to them, it is often viewed as deception to them.  If you are like me, trust is one of the most important things in a relationship.  Once I extend trust to another, it has been earned.  However, I give trust much too easily.  I feel that I am so close to this person I can trust them.  Then I find out a secret about me they have been withholding. Sometimes the secret is something I should never hear, because it is hurtful.  I would rather feel the hurt than feel deceived.  

Why Does it hurt?  When we feel we are deceived, it places the whole relationship on the line for us.  The question is, can we get past it or will it be something we will always carry with us in the relationship?  If you are unable to let go of the deception and trust again over time, it becomes best to distance yourself from the relationship partly due to the strong negativity and anger you may be feeling. 

We are not victims when we are deceived, unless we choose to be.  We can rise above the deception, and see that person who deceived us in a whole new light.  Perhaps part of our trust came from placing them on a pedestal when they are human just like us. 

I have one other comment on deception from a loved one.  Oftentimes, we don’t get over it and how we view this person is with a whole new perspective. It is hard not to do this because the deceit may be something kept from you, that you feel you should have been told.  We should remember the deception but be able to let go o our emotions and forgive. 

We can forgive the mistake, but trust must be built again more carefully, and we may be able to get past the deceit. If this is the case and it is a family member, try talking to them about your feelings.  Sometimes just hearing “I am so sorry” helps us to move past being deceived.  We are all human and we all make bad judgement calls from time to time.  Make sure what you expect from another person when you deem them as trustworthy is not realistic.  There is a certain power when we forgive and it may be to get past our feelings of hurt and pain we accept the mistake and move past it.  After all we are all human and do make mistakes.  Samantha LeBoeuf

ALLIES “WHEN DO WE KNOW WE CAN TRUST ONE?”

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Allies are supposed to be one of the team. Often, however, allies are not all they were cracked up to be.  This article will share with you what to look for so you can fully trust yourself.  Before going any further we will first look at the Webster meaning of the word ally.

Webster definition of ally- 1.  to side with or support for something or someone.  2.  A person or organization that cooperates with or helps another in a particular activity.  3.  a state cooperating with another for a military or other purpose, typically by treaty. 

Daily Wisdom Word Definition of Allies. 1.  a party or individual that will stand beside us when we are involved in something requiring team work.  2.  a person you will trust with your job performance to help.  you will still get the same credit on the project sharing the work load instead of isolating which is not effective.  What I will do now will paint a clear picture of how you will know who is the right ally  you can work with. 

A.  Make sure who you pick has been on the job less than you or Junior executive.   

B.  Pick someone who does not gossip about others, seems dedicated to the work and can do it successfully.  You are setting yourself up for a potential opportunity for a candidate in an equal position as yourself.  They could try taking the credit and may intercede, complaining about the load of work that they are doing.

C.  Watch ones actions over their words.  90 percent of communication is done through nonverbal communication. 

D.  Make sure to share!  In other words, YOU, not the company let your assistant know if the project is a winner they will be getting a large bonus. 

It is hard in the world with so much competition to even get a job and expectations having risen for all candidates applying for a job.  I worked in sales for 20 years in selling new homes, in the high end price range.  Someone, (another salesperson who was looking to get ahead and will do whatever they have to to move up the ladder is NOT what you want.  Yet, the ally is doing so much work and should be rewarded and complimented to management by you as lead project manager. 

The bonus is established privately between you and your partner due to loyalty you need so an ally can still win. Without that ally going up against you or trying to take credit when credit is NOT due.  It can be a kind world, but with sales, especially in the position I had, there is much competition.  What this meant even when I got a sale, and was recognized for it is that someone else got two sales.   “you are only as good as your last sale so get to work!” 

We have talked about potential issues with allies and have covered ways to find the right ally when you have been assigned a project.  I can only share with you what I have experienced.  Perhaps other positions are not so competitive.  However, the suggestions given, lead to eventual friendships developed with allies.  We must always treat our ally well.  Thank you for reading.  Samantha

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IMAGE “DOES IT MATTER WHAT OTHERS THINK?”

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Our image is important to our ego but not so much in our heart.  When we focus on the physical part of our image, ego and physical image seem to go hand in hand.  To have self-confidence, it okay to care about our image and positive to take care of ourselves.  However, image is not everything.  In fact, it is rather sad to see how much image matters to some of us.  There are many other things we can focus on other than our image in the physical realm.  However, there is self-image which is made up of internal imaging and  ego-imaging.   Self-image is worth working on, but we need to be focusing on those things that really matter.  We should take care of ourselves and do our best to look better if we feel better because we do this.  Change, however tends to take place from the inside out.  If we change ourself within, we increase the lightness in our heart.  this is projected to the outside.  You can see in one’s smile if they glow or have this internal iight.  

Let us take a look at the definition of image in our Webster Dictionary and the daily wisdom words definition.  Webster definition of image-1. a representation of an external force or a person or a thing of art.  2.  a mental representation or representation of an overall image. (partial)

Daily Wisdom Word Definition of image-a human being represented in whole part such as the mental, physical and internal part of who we are.  

Our self-image influences our self-esteem and our self-worth.  However you can take image and focus on it further than necessary. By only working on the physical image (how you wish to see yourself), instead of both the internal image, and external image.  (what kind of person you want to become which is a balanced person).  If one is spending hours in the mirror using their time to perfect physical flaws, this is when we see someone who has an ego-image.  Having an ego image is a sign that the individual, so obsessed with their looks does not have time to be well balanced or internally focused on happiness, Focusing on who one is  from the inside out develops depth and introspection. 

To know ourself is a part of learning to love ourself.  Mentally healthy people, when it comes to physical image or internal image tend to be well balanced not only working on one’s image, but developing all parts of who we are.  Working on all sides of acceptance regardless of our flaws and assets creates a well balanced individual.  We are human beings and were never designed to be a creature of perfection.  We must accept all of who we are and do our best to work on things that we wish to change daily.  Because we all fall from time to time, we will make mistakes building our self-image, and living life.  If you wish to meet someone with wisdom, it comes from those individuals who make mistakes and learn from them, instead of repeating them over and over again.  How we deal with our image including our ups, downs, flaws, imperfections, mistakes, accomplishments all working towards developing who we are and with effort, a wonderful person and self-image.  thanks so much for reading today!  Samantha Leboeuf

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FETISHES “WHAT THEY INDICATE ABOUT OUR PERSONALITY”

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OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY IS “FETISHES.”  BEFORE GOING INTO WHAT THEY REFLECT IN US, I WILL PROVIDE OUR WEBSTER DEFINITION OF FETISHES AND THE DAILY WISDOM WORD MEANING FOR FETISHES. 

WEBSTER DEFINITION FOR FETISHES-1.  A FORM OF SEXUAL DESIRE IN WHICH GRATIFICATION DEPENDS TO AN ABNORMAL DEGREE OR SOME OBJECT OR ITEM OF CLOTHING, PART OF THE BODY, ETC.  2.  AN EXCESSIVE AND IRRATIONAL DEVOTION OR COMMITMENT TO A PARTICULAR THING. 3.  AN INANIMATE OBJECT WORSHIPPED FOR ITS SUPPOSED MAGICAL POWERS OR BECAUSE IT IS CONSIDERED TO BE INHABITED BY A SPIRIT. 

 DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION, FETISHES-THOSE THINGS NEEDED FOR CERTAIN INDIVIDUALS TO WORSHIP OR ENJOY THAT ARE EXTERNAL OBJECTS OR AN INVISIBLE FORCE LIKE MAGIC OR A SPIRIT TO BE CONTENT. 

WHAT DO FETISHES TELL US ABOUT OURSELVES?  MANY TIMES, DEPENDING ON THE FETISH, IT CAN BE VERY COMMON FOR US TO LIKE A PARTICULAR  SEXUALLY OR EVEN BE PARTIAL TO A PARTICULAR WAY SOMETHING IS DON PARTICULAR THINGS ARE DONE BECAUSE TO DO IT ANOTHER WAY WOULD BOTHER US. FETISHES ARE NOT ALWAYS SEXUAL IN NATURE, BUT A PART OF WHAT  THE PERSONALITY DESIRES.  FETISHES CAN ALSO BE SUBCONSCIOUS AND WE AREN’T AWARE OF THEM.  PERHAPS WE WITNESSED AS A CHILD FROM OUR ROLE MODELS SOMETHING THAT WAS OUT OF THE NORM. 

IT IS QUITE POSSIBLE TO CARRY THIS WITH US AND TAKE UP FETISHES RELATED OR THE SAME AS WHAT WE WITNESSED AT AN INFLUENTIAL AGE.  REGARDLESS, DEPENDING ON THE LEVEL AND DEGREE OF FETISH, IT CAN BE HARMLESS.   IF WE LOOK AT THE THIRD PART OF THE WEBSTER DEFINITION FOR FETISH, WHICH IS AN ABNORMAL ATTACHMENT TO OBJECTS ASSIGNING THEM SPIRITUAL VALUE OR SEEING OBJECTS INVALUABLE SUCH AS A FAVORITE SHIRT, OR PLACING TO MUCH IMPORTANCE ON THESE OBJECTS BY WORSHIPPING THEM, IS WHEN FETISHES BECOME STRANGE. 

I HAVE SEEN THOSE AND HEARD THEIR REASONING BEHIND BELIEVING IN WHITE MAGIC, BLACK MAGIC, OR AN OBJECT THEY SEE AS SPIRITUAL, HOLD DEEP SIGNIFICANCE, AND FEEL THEIR THINKING AND FAITH IS REALITY IT BORDERS ON OBSESSION.   I HAVE ALSO SEEN FETISHES THAT ARE PARTIAL TO ONE INDIVIDUAL IF THEY ARE LEADERS AT HEART, BECOME LEADERS OF CULTS.  I ALWAYS FEEL  WHAT THOSE WORSHIPPED OBJECTS ARE, HAVE ONLY HOLD ANY POWER IF OUR OWN WORSHIPPING AND ENERGY GIVES IT THAT POWER. IF A FETISH HOLDS GREAT POWER AND SIGNIFICANCE AND HAS DEEP PERSONAL MEANING TO THEM, THEY DO DEVOTE MUCH OF THEIR HAPPINESS AND CONTENTMENT WITH THIS OBJECT OR BELIEF SYSTEM. 

MY THEORY ALWAYS HAS BEEN FETISHES REFLECT A NEED OR WANT IN OURSELVES.  THIS MAKES A FETISHES MORE INDICATIVE ABOUT US ESPECIALLY WHEN A FETISH IS CARRIED TO AN EXTREME.  IT CAN BE THAT A FETISH GOES AS FAR AS TO DOMINATE OUR LIFE.  WHEN A FETISH BECOMES MORE IMPORTANT THAN IT SHOULD BE, IT IS NO LONGER A FETIS BUT FOCAL POINT OF OUR LIFE, OR OBSESSION.  WE OURSELVES GET CARRIED AWAY TO AN EXTREME WITH THE FETISH.   WE SEE THIS WHEN OUR POWER AND FAITH GET INVOLVED. 

THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING ABOUT FETISHES TODAY!  PLEASE LEAVE YOUR THOUGHTS AND COMMENTS ON FETISHES YOU HAVE BENEATH THIS POST AND BE THE ONE TO START A DISCUSSION BY “JOINING THE DISCUSSION” IN THE AREA BELOW. 

THANK YOU SO MUCH,

SAMANTHA

 

 

SURVIVORS

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OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY IS  SURVIVOR.  A SURVIVOR IS A HERO,  THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH TRAUMA AND EXPERIENCES THAT OTHERS HAVEN’T.  LIFE IS FULL OF SURPRISES.  WHEN WE ARE BORN AND SOMEONE IS OUR MOTHER OR/AND FATHER, WE DON’T GET TO CHOOSE.  OFTEN SURVIVORS ARE INDIVIDUALS WITH WISDOM.  WE ALL HAVE “SURVIVAL” INSTINCTS”.  IF WE ARE A SURVIVOR, WE HAVE FALLEN.  I VISUALIZE AS A SURVIVOR WHO HAS INTERNAL BRUISES, WHEN LIVING A LIFE WITH CHARACTER, CHALLENGES, HEARTACHE, PAIN, ILLNESS, DYSFUNCTION, ABUSE, RELATIONSHIPS  AND EXPERIENCES. 

A SURVIVOR HAS BEEN THROUGH ALL OF THESE, AND SOMEHOW MANAGES TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE.  A SURVIVOR HAS SPECIFIC TOOLS THAT HAVE PREPARED THEM TO HANDLE THE LOSSES LIFE SHOWS US.  A SURVIVOR IS MORE THAN COMING OUT ON THE OTHER SIDE OF HORRIBLE LOSS OR TRAGEDY.

THEY ARE INDIVIDUALS WHO HAVE HAD ENORMOUS CHALLENGES TO COPE WITH AND GET THROUGH THEIR EXPERIENCE THE WORST OF THE WORST IN LIFE.  WE ALL CAN BE SURVIVORS OF ONE EXPERIENCE.  A SURVIVOR, HOWEVER HAS BEEN THROUGH MANY EXPERIENCES,  IN THE MIDST OF EACH CHALLENGE, THEY DO FALL DOWN JUST AS WE ALL DO.  THEY HAVE EXPERIENCED IN MANY CASES HORRIBLE, HURTFUL AND CRUSHING BLOWS.  WE CAN GET TO THE OTHER SIDE.  WE WILL FALL IN LIFE.  WHAT CREATES A SURVIVOR IS HOW THEY MANAGE TO FALL, BUT GET BACK ON THE HORSE, SO TO SPEAK. 

THEY CAN SURVIVE ANYTHING AND HAVE A CERTAINTY IN THEMSELVES THAT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, THEY WILL COME OUT ON THE OTHER SIDE, STAND UP, AND BECOME MORE NOT BECAUSE OF A TRAGIC EXPERIENCE, BUT IN SPITE OF IT.  THEY USUALLY HAVE MANAGED BUT CHOOSE TO LOOK AT THESE EXPERIENCES TO CHANGE THEIR PERSPECTIVE. 

THERE IS SOMETHING IN THEIR EYES CALLED “DETERMINATION”.  THEY HANDLE REJECTION FLOURISHING FROM IT.  THEY SEE A LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL THAT WE CAN’T SEE. SURVIVORS THE HOPE AND BELIEF IN SELF THAT THEY NOT ONLY GO THROUGH THIS HORRIBLE LIFE EXPERIENCE THEY GAINED EACH AND EVERY TIME AND GROW FROM IT IN CHARACTER AND WITH DIGNITY.  SURVIVORS ARE INDIVIDUALS WHO KNOW WHAT TO DO IN A CRISIS HAVING THE STRENGTH FOR THEMSELVES AND THOSE AROUND THEM.  IT DOESN’T MATTER IF THEY HAVE SUFFERED. TO THEM THEY HAVE WOUNDS BUT THEY HAVE HEALED FROM INTERNAL SCARS AND  FIND A WAY TO WIN. 

SURVIVORS ARE THOSE INDIVIDUALS WE SEE FOR EXAMPLE, IF THEY ARE IN A WHEELCHAIR AND ARE OPTIMISTIC AND POSITIVE, IN SPITE OF THEIR SHORTCOMINGS.  SURVIVORS ARE NOT INDIVIDUALS WHO ALLOW THEMSELVES TO GET IN THEIR OWN WAY AND ARE NOT BORN AS A SURVIVOR.  THEY ARE CREATED OVER EXPERIENCES AND AT ALL TIMES COUNT THEIR BLESSINGS AND DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR THEMSELVES WHEN THINGS DON’T GO THEIR WAY. 

INSTEAD, THEY TAKE THE INVISIBLE CUES IN LIFE AND LET IT LEAD THEM BUT DECIDE TO BECOME A BETTER BECAUSE OF THESE AND HOW THEY COPE. ARE YOU A SURVIVOR?  LEAVE COMMENTS AND LIKES BELOW THE POSTS IN THE “JOIN THE DISCUSSION AREA” OR SHARE A POEM ON SURVIVORS.  IT IS THROUGH SHEER WILL AND DETERMINATION, NEVER GIVING UP AFTER A FALL  THEY ALWAYS FIND A WAY TO A SOLUTION.  ARE YOU A SURVIVOR?   SHARE WITH US WHY IN THE COMMENTS SECTION BELOW.  THANK YOU SO MUCH, SAMANTHA

 

OTHER DAILY WISDOM WORDS YOU MAY LIKE, RELATED:  http://dailywisdomwords.com/wiseadvice/be-the-hero/

SUPPORT

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OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY IS SUPPORT.  WHEN WE  GIVE SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGE OTHERS THROUGH POSITIVITY WE ARE WORKING ON GOD’S BEHALF.  I DON’T HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS BUT DO KNOW THAT WE, AS WRITERS AND LEADERS WAS CALLED UPON TO SET THE STAGE.  SUPPORT IS VERY IMPORTANT FROM OTHERS.  IT IS IMPORTANT TO OURSELVES.  WE ARE AN INDIVIDUAL’S FOR A REASON. 

WE MUST BE STABLE, STANDING ON OUR OWN TWO FEET BEFORE OTHERS CAN BE LEANED ON.  WHEN WE NEED SUPPORT, IT IS IMPORTANT TO COMMUNICATE THIS TO OUR LOVED ONES.  IT IS OKAY TO NEED OTHERS, WHAT HAPPENS IF WE HAVE AN ISSUE THAT WE SIMPLY CAN’T HANDLE?  WE NEED TO ACCEPT THE FACT THERE ARE TIMES WE WILL NEED ANOTHER PERSON TO LEAN ON.  WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DON’T HAVE A GOOD SUPPORT SYSTEM? 

WE USUALLY ISOLATE AND BECOME DEPRESSED.  SOMETIMES, IT IS SO HARD TO FIGURE OUT IF OR WHEN WE NEED SUPPORT.  THE SUPPORT CAN BE NECESSARY EMOTIONALLY, PHYSICALLY OR PSYCHOLOGICALLY.  I FEEL LOST AT TIMES IN MY LIFE.  BEING PERMANENTLY DISABLED IS DIFFICULT.  WE STOP CARING ABOUT THE THINGS  WE USED TO ENJOY. OUR CHILDREN GROW UP AND LEAVE TO FORM THEIR OWN FAMILIES.  THERE OFTEN ARE OTHERS THAT WE CAN REACH OUT TO. BUT DO NOT. 

IT MAY FEEL LIKE OUR WORLD IS FALLING APART.  HOW DO WE HANDLE THIS?  WE REACH OUT FOR HELP FROM A PROFESSIONAL.  THEY CANNOT FIX US.  WE MUST “FIX OURSELVES”.  WHAT A PROFESSIONAL CAN DO IS PROVIDE CLARITY AND DIRECTION, TEACHING YOU WAYS TO CALM DOWN IF, FOR EXAMPLE YOU SUFFER WITH ANXIETY.  BECAUSE COUNSELORS AND MANY PSYCHOLOGISTS ARE NOT DOCTN AREAS WE MAYORS AND NOT ABLE TO PRESCRIBE ANTIDEPRESSANTS, OR ANTI-ANXIETY MEDICATION, THEY DO HAVE THE ABILITY TO KNOW IF YOU NEED MEDICATION AS PART OF AN OVERALL TREATMENT PLAN.  THEY ALSO CAN PROVIDE EMDR TREATMENT FOR TRAUMA AND NARRATIVE PSYCHOLOGY TO HELP THOSE ISSUES SURFACE SO TOGETHER, YOU CAN DEAL WITH YOUR PSYCHOLOGICAL ISSUES THIS REQUIRES DILIGENCE ON YOUR PART TO GET SUPPORT WHEN IT IS NEEDED.  SOMETIMES, TALKING WITH A FRIEND, JUST ISN’T ENOUGH.

THEY CAN’T FIX ISSUES, BUT TEACH US TO COPE WITH THEM.  COGNITIVE THERAPY, ER THERE ARE TIMES WE MAY NEED SOMEONE TO ADDRESS WITH US WHAT THEY SEE OBJECTIVELY WITHIN US.  WE MAY BE IN DENIAL AND SADLY, THIS IS THE VERY TIME WE NEED SUPPORT. WHAT IS THE DEFINITION OF SUPPORT IN OUR WEBSTER DICTIONARY AND THE DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION OF SUPPORT? 

WEBSTER DEFINITION FOR SUPPORT-1.  GIVE ASSISTANCE TO, ESPECIALLY FINANCIALLY, ENABLE TO FUNCTION OR ACT.  2. GIVE APPROVAL, COMFORT OR ENCOURAGEMENT TO. (PARTIAL).

DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION OF SUPPORT-A PLATFORM OF INDIVIDUALS INCLUDING MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS AND LOVED ONES WHO HELP YOU IN TIMES OF NEED.  

SUPPORT FROM OTHERS IS NOTHING TO FEEL ASHAMED OF WHEN YOU NEED HELP.  THEY WOULD RATHER HELP YOU THAN SEE YOU COPE WITH YOUR ISSUE ALONE.  THERE ARE MANY WAYS TO PROVIDE SUPPORT.   SUPPORT CAN BE GIVEN LOVINGLY, EMOTIONALLY, AND EVEN PHYSICAL HELP QUALIFIES IN AREAS WE NEED SUPPORT.  IT IS OUR RESPONSIBILITY TO REACH OUT WHEN WE NEED TO WITH OTHERS.  THANKS FOR READING, SAMANTHA

other dailywisdomwords.com posts relevant to this:  http://dailywisdomwords.com/daily-wisdom-words/encouragement/

 

POSITIVITY

BLAME “THE BLAME GAME”

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OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY IS BLAME.  I HAVE AN ACRONYM FOR BLAME THAT I THINK OF EVERY TIME I HEAR THIS DAILY WISDOM WORD. BLAME. BLAME IS,  B-LINDLY L-ABELING  A-LLEGATIONS ERRONEOUSLY.  I THINK OF ALL THE TIMES I’VE BEEN BLAMED FOR THINGS I WAS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR, OR I BLAMED OTHERS FOR. 

THERE HAVE ALSO BEEN CASES WHERE I HAVE UNINTENTIONALLY BLAMED OTHERS FOR EVENTS THAT TRANSPIRED IN MY LIFE, I HONESTLY BELIEVED SOMEONE ELSE WAS TO BLAME FOR ACTIONS THAT I TOOK. IN CASES WHERE I HAVE BEEN BLAMED, I WAS VERY HURT AND FELT MISUNDERSTOOD. TRUTH IS A STRANGELY ONE THING THAT MOST OF THE TIME, OVER TIME.  

YES, MANY THINGS IN LIFE, WE AREN’T IN CONTROL OF, AND CAN’T CHANGE.  HOWEVER, WE CAN CHANGE OUR PERCEPTION AND STOP BLAMING OTHERS  THOSE FOR CHOICES WE )  THEY GAVE AWAY THEIR POWER OVER TIME TO THEIR PARTNER.  OFTENTIMES I HEAR THESE KINDS OF THINGS FROM THEM.  FOR EXAMPLE “I CAN’T GO THE BIRTHDAY PARTY.  HE WON’T ALLOW IT”.  THIS KILLS ME AS I KNOW THAT THEIR RELATIONSHIP HAS GOTTEN TO A CRITICAL STAGE AND IS UNHEALTHY. THEIR PARTNER CREATIVELY USES MIND GAMES CONVINCING THEM THEY ARE HAPPY IN THIS RELATIONSHIP. 

 LIFE DOESN’T OFTEN ALLOW CONTRADICTIONS SUCH AS “BLAMING OTHERS”.  TO FEEL COMPLETELY IN YOUR HEART ANYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN THE RELATIONSHIP IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE’S  FAULT, HOLDING NO RESPONSIBILITY  OR ACCOUNTABILITY, I SEE THEY ARE IN DENIAL AT THE VERY LEAST,  THEY CHOSE TO LISTEN TO SOMEONE THEY CLEARLY DON’T TRUST.  I BELIEVE THEIR PART, IS GIVING AWAY THEIR OWN POWER OR CONTROL OF CHOICE AND FREE WILL OVER THEIR OWN LIFE. 

MOST OF US SAY WE WANT TO BE SOMEONE IN CONTROL OF OUR  OWN DESTINY.   THE REASONS BEHIND NOT WANTING TO MAKE OUR OWN DECISIONS IS KNOWING IF WE  MAKE A MISTAKE WE MUST ACCEPT THE CONSEQUENCES.  THEY HAVE ARRIVED AT A NEW STAGE I,,  RELATIONSHIP SO MANY FRIENDS GET TO BEFORE EVER CONSIDERING GETTING OUT OF IT.  NOW, THEY HAVE GIVEN MUCH OF THEIR POWER OF CHOICE AND THEY FEEL THERE IS NO TURNING BACK. MOST OF THEM GIVE UP TRYING.  OFTEN TIMES THEY ARE FRIENDS THAT HAVE NO CLUE HOW THEY ARRIVED  IN THE SITUATION TO BEGIN WITH.  IF OUR LACK OF SELF CONFIDENCE IS EVIDENT OR  SUBCONSCIOUSLY WE FEEL A LACK OF CONFIDENCE,   WHAT WE SAY AND WHAT WE DO, ARE TWO VERY DIFFERENT THINGS. 

WE DON’T REALLY BELIEVE WE ARE IN A WONDERFUL RELATIONSHIP. WE ATTRACT UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS THAT WE MISIDENTIFY TO BEGIN WITH.  IN THE LONG RUN, THE ABUSED HAS SETTLED INTO THIS ROUTINE MISTAKING IT AS NORMAL. WE SEE A “GOOD PERSON” UNABLE TO SEE THE MANIPULATION OR CHOOSING NOT TO SEE IT FROM THEIR PARTNER.   ALL SORTS OF JUSTIFICATIONS ARE MADE. WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO IT, THEY ARE MORE TERRIFIED TO BE ALONE THAN THEY ARE HAVING THEIR PARTNER ABUSE THEM.

GASLIGHTING,  IS USED BY THE ABUSER IN A RELATIONSHIP AS A TOOL USED TO CAST BLAME ON THE ABUSED.   IF POSSIBLE, THE POTENTIAL OUTCOME OF A DATE, LETS SAY, IS USED BY THE ABUSER TO FIND A WAY  TO BLAME THE ABUSED.  THIS OFTEN IS A MANIPULATIVE TECHNIQUE OR A FORM OF BLAME THEM, AFFECTING KEY AREAS OF ONESELF BEING MORE DAMAGED THAN THE ABUSED HAD BEEN BEFORE BEING IN THIS RELATIONSHIP. 

THE ABUSER USES SHAME OR BLAME SO THE ABUSED IS AT FAULT FOR WHATEVER THE ABUSER CAN GET AWAY WITH.  THE ABUSER, BY TEARING AT THE OTHERS “SELF-ESTEEM” TAKES POWER AWAY FROM THE ABUSED, WHO ALLOWS THEM TO TAKE AWAY ANY ABILITY TO CHOOSE .  THEY WILL BLAME THE ABUSED FOR THE ROOT CAUSE OF ALL PROBLEMS.  THIS IS ANOTHER FORM OF GASLIGHTING.  THE ABUSER IS A MASTER AT PUSHING THE OTHERS MIND CONTROL BUTTONS. 

HE WILL FOR EXAMPLE, SAY, “HURRY UP, WE DON’T WANT TO BE LATE.”  THE RESPONSE FROM THE ABUSED IS, “I WILL BE DOWN IN A MINUTE” AND SHE OR HE IS.  THE ABUSER WILL THEN SAY, “I AM NOT GOING”.  THIS IS A GOOD EXAMPLE OF HOW A MANIPULATIVE OR NARCISSISTIC PARTNER WILL HANDLE MOST SITUATIONS ESPECIALLY  IF WE ARE NOT AWARE OF WHAT THEY ARE DOING OR CHOOSE TO OVERLOOK IT . THEY ULTIMATELY BELIEVE THEY ARE TO BLAME FOR DESTROYING THE EVENING. 

THE GOOD NEWS IS THERE IS HOPE FOR ANY PERSON IN AN UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP, FIRST, THEY MUST STOP JUSTIFYING WHY THEY MUST STAY AND  BEGIN SEEING THE TRUTH.  ANYONE CAN FIND HELP IF THEY REALLY WANT IT AND ARE READY TO BE STRONG ENOUGH TO GET OUT OF  ADDICTIVE ROLE OR HABIT PATTERN. THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING ABOUT BLAME TODAY!  I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR YOUR INPUT AND IDEAS OR THOUGHTS. BENEATH THIS POST IN THE ” JOIN THE DISCUSSION” AREA SO START A DISCUSSION THAT WILL RESULT IN A POSITIVE DIRECTION. USE OUR WISE ADVICE PAGE IF YOU NEED FURTHER HELP, WHERE WE CAN LISTEN AND DIRECT YOU TOWARDS A STEP BY STEP PROCESS TO GET OUT OF WHAT IS MAKING YOU UNHAPPY ALL OF THE TIME.

FOCUS ON THE SOLUTION, NOT THE PROBLEM.  SL

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UNKNOWNS

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OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD IS “UNKNOWNS”.   I CHOSE THIS WORD BECAUSE IT IS THE ONE THING WE CAN’T OR DON’T CALCULATE WHEN WE PLAN FOR LIFE STRATEGIES.  THERE ARE MANY UNKNOWNS, LEADING ME TO BELIEVE THAT WE AREN’T IN CONTROL OF AS MUCH AS WE LIKE TO THINK.  THERE IS PLANNING THAT LAYS OUT MANY VARIABLES ACCOUNTING FOR THE UNKNOWN. 

HOWEVER, WE SIMPLY CAN’T PLAN OUR LIFE DOWN TO EVERY ANGLE.  IF WE TAKE UNKNOWNS A STEP FURTHER, WITHOUT THEM, IT WOULD BE DIFFICULT TO GROW AS INDIVIDUALS.  BEING PREPARED FOR CURVEBALLS IS PARTLY WHAT MAKES LIFE INTERESTING.  THESE CURVEBALLS OR UNKNOWNS IN LIFE ARE WHAT WE HAVE TO BE EMOTIONALLY PREPARED FOR.   THERE IS NOT ONLY THE UNSEEN, BUT THE UNFORESEEN. 

MANY THINGS GO ON AROUND US WE COULD NOT POSSIBLY BE AWARE OF.  THERE ARE SIMPLY TOO MANY MOVING PARTS IN LIFE INCLUDING WHAT DECISIONS ARE MADE WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE DIRECTLY AND INDIRECTLY INVOLVED IN EVENTS IN LIFE.  WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, I USED TO BELIEVE THAT I WAS IN CONTROL OF EVERYTHING. 

I THINK WE ALL SHOULD PLAN FOR LIFE, AND ANY GOAL WE WISH TO ACHIEVE.  I WAS FORCED HOWEVER, WHEN I WAS 30 YEARS OLD, TO TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT MY SUMMATIONS ON LIFE WHEN A CAR HIT ME AT AN INTERSECTION WHILE I WAS MAKING A LEFT HAND TURN AT 50 MILES PER HOUR. 

THIS EVENT SHOWED ME WE AREN’T IN CONTROL OF ALL OF LIFE’S EVENTS.  BEFORE GOING ANY FURTHER, LET US TAKE A LOOK AT THE MEANING OF THE WORD, UNKNOWN IN OUR WEBSTER DICTIONARY AND THE DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION. 

WEBSTER DEFINITION FOR THE MEANING OF UNKNOWN-AN UNKNOWN QUANTITY OR VARIABLE.   THAT WHICH IS UNKNOWN. 

DAILY WISDOM WORD MEANING-THE THINGS WE CANNOT PLAN FOR THAT SIMPLY HAPPEN IN LIFE. 

I KNOW WHEN I THINK OF THE WORD “UNKNOWNS”,  I AM DEALING WITH THAT PART OF REALITY THAT IS PART OF IT THAT WE CAN’T ANTICIPATE.  WHAT HAVE YOU HAD HAPPEN TO YOU THAT WAS AN UNKNOWN?  HOW DID YOU COPE OR HANDLE IT?  UNKNOWNS ARE OFTEN THE ONE THING THAT CREATES A SIDE OF US WHICH BELIEVE IN FATE OR DESTINY AND YES, GOD. 

I DO BELIEVE THAT GOD HOLDS AND HANDLES THE “MASTER PLAN”.  THE MASTER PLAN TO ME IS THE PLAN THAT IS PLAYING OUT IN ALL THE UNSEEN THINGS WE CAN’T ANTICIPATE.  THERE ARE GOOD AND BAD THINGS THAT WHEN WE THINK OF THE UNKNOWNS.  PERHAPS WE GET MONEY WE WERE NOT EXPECTING WE ARE DESPERATELY IN NEED OF. 

PERHAPS WE LOSE SOMEONE TO DEATH WE WERE NOT EXPECTING AND MUST LIVE WITH THIS GRIEF.  THERE IS ONE THING POSITIVE THAT COMES OVER A LIFETIME FROM UNKNOWNS.  WE GROW EMOTIONALLY.  DESPITE THIS, IT CAN BE PAINFUL, JOYFUL, SURPRISING, EMOTIONAL, SAD, HAPPY, EXCITING, AND OVERWHELMING WHEN AN UNKNOWN HAPPENS. 

WITHOUT THE UNKNOWN, WE WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO GROW EMOTIONALLY AS HUMAN BEINGS.  THIS WOULD BE THE SADDEST PLAN OF ALL FROM MY PERSPECTIVE.  THANK YOU FOR READING TODAY.  WANT TO JOIN THE DISCUSSION?  BELOW THIS POST IS JUST THE PLACE TO START OR JOIN IN A DISCUSSION. 

YOUR COMMENTS AND PARTICIPATION AND QUESTIONS ARE APPRECIATED VERY MUCH.  IT IS WHAT LETS ME KNOW YOU ARE READING MY THOUGHTS AND BLOGS EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT IN AGREEMENT WITH THEM.  THANKS SO MUCH! 

SAMANTHA/FOUNDER-DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM

 

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ATTACHMENT

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OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY IS ATTACHMENT.  THIS POST FOCUSES ON MATERNAL BONDING BETWEEN CHILD AND CAREGIVER AND THE OUTCOMES OF IMPROPERLY BONDING OR ATTACHING TO  A CAREGIVER.  ATTACHMENT DISORDER IS THE OUTCOME OF UNHEALTHY BONDING AS A BABY WITH A CAREGIVER.  BONDING AND ATTACHMENT ARE CRUCIAL AND NECESSARY FOR ALL SPECIES.  HUMAN BEINGS, ESPECIALLY BABIES NEED ATTACHMENT.  BEFORE GOING ANY FURTHER, TAKE A LOOK AT THE MEANING OF ATTACHMENT THAT APPLIES IN THE WEBSTER DICTIONARY AND DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION. 

WEBSTER DEFINITION OF ATTACHMENT-(PARTIAL)  AN EXPERIENCE, FEELING OR EMOTION SHARED WITH ANOTHER HUMAN BEING, PARTICULARLY A CAREGIVER. 

DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION OF ATTACHMENT-A RELATIONSHIP THAT HAPPENS BETWEEN A MOTHER, OR FATHER AND THEIR CHILD.  2.  A RELATIONSHIP OF CONNECTION THAT OCCURS BETWEEN TWO PEOPLE WITH EMOTIONS, LOVE ABLE TO ALSO BE INDEPENDENT OF ONE ANOTHER. 

ATTACHMENT IS NECESSARY, BUT THE MOST IMPORTANT BOND OF ALL IS THE ATTACHMENT WHICH EXISTS BETWEEN MOTHER AND BABY.  INFANTS BEGIN BONDING AND ATTACHING IN THE WOMB BEFORE BIRTH .  THIS IS ESPECIALLY STRONG WHEN OXYTOCIN IS PRODUCED.  (BREAST FEEDING BABIES).  THERE ARE MANY OTHER WAYS FOR THE CHILD TO ATTACH EMOTIONALLY, ESPECIALLY IN OUR FORMATIVE YEARS.   OUR FORMATIVE YEARS START FROM BIRTH TO THREE YEARS OLD, AND CONTINUE FROM 3 TO 6 YEARS OLD. 

CHILDREN, ESPECIALLY BABIES INTERACT WITH THEIR CAREGIVER OR MOTHER BY CRYING.  CRYING IS ONE OF THE ONLY WAYS A VERY YOUNG BABY HAS TO ATTACHES BONDING W THEIR CAREGIVER.  IF CRYING IS IGNORED BY A MOTHER OR FATHER FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME, THIS CAN BE THE BEGINNING OF WHAT LATER IS KNOWN AS ATTACHMENT DISORDER.  ATTACHMENT DISORDER HAPPENS WHEN BONDING DID NOT OCCUR PROPERLY WHEN A CHILD WAS AT HIS OR HER YOUNGEST AGE, BABYHOOD. 

WHEN A LACK OF MATERNAL BONDING PLAYS ITSELF OUT  FOR AN ADULT,  ONE SUFFERS WITH ATTACHMENT DISORDER.  ATTACHMENT DISORDER WAS DISCOVERED AND LABELED IN 2014.  IT IS SEEN IN ADULTS WHO DID NOT BOND APPROPRIATELY WITH THEIR CAREGIVERS AND IS PLAYED OUT IN THEIR RELATIONSHIPS.  ATTACHMENT DISORDER IS BEST DESCRIBED BY THE FOLLOWING EXAMPLES:

EXAMPLE A-  KATIE DID NOT BOND OR ATTACH WITH HER MOTHER PROPERLY AND HER NEEDS WERE IGNORED.  SHE ENTERS INTO A SERIES OF BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS THAT PLAY OUT WITH HER BEING DESPERATELY CLINGY AND INSECURE. 

EXAMPLE B.  SALLY IS NOT ABLE TO SHOW AFFECTION PROPERLY TO HER LOVED ONES AND DOESN’T ALLOW HERSELF TO GET TOO CLOSE IN HER RELATIONSHIPS BECAUSE WHEN SHE HAS DONE THIS, IT CAUSES HER TO RUN HOT OR COLD IN SHOWING EMOTION TO HER PARTNER.  THIS IS ALSO KNOWN AS REACTIVE ATTACHMENT DISORDER.  SALLY HAS A HARD TIME SHOWING ANY EMOTION AND INTERACTION WITH SOMEONE SHE LOVES. THIS AFFECTS HER WHEN THERE IN HER ABILITY TO MAKE  EYE CONTACT.  CONNECTION EQUALS PAIN.  THEREFORE IT IS SO HARD FOR SALLY TO CONNECT AND BOND WITH ANY PARTNER. 

SPECIFIC SIGNS OF ATTACHMENT DISORDER INCLUDE FEELING EMPTY INSIDE, FEELINGS OF WORTHLESSNESS, FEELING JOYLESS, APPEARING LISTLESS, COGNITIVE AND LANGUAGE DELAYS IN CHILDHOOD, IN CAPACITY TO DISPLAY EMOTIONS IN A HEALTHY, LOVING WAY  CAUSING ONE TO SELF COMFORT THROUGH ROCKING BACK AND FORTH, STROKING ONE’S ARM AND OTHER SELF COMFORTING MEASURES.  

ULTIMATELY, ATTACHMENT DISORDER, OR A CHILD TO ATTACHING PROPERLY, RESULTS IN ONE’S OWN INABILITY TO COMMUNICATE THEIR NEEDS, SHOW EMOTION, CONTROL ANGER WHICH IS DISPROPORTIONATE TO A SITUATION, AVERSION TO HUMAN TOUCH AND APPEARING COLD OR UNEMOTIONAL.   

ATTACHMENT IS NECESSARY IN ALL MANKIND, AND A PERSON WHO SUFFERS FROM A LACK OF  ATTACHMENT AND BONDING WITH THEIR CAREGIVER HAS DIFFICULTY FORMING HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS. FORTUNATELY, MOST CHILDREN SEEM TO OVERCOME ISSUES OF ATTACHMENT AND ONLY 10% OF CHILDREN WHO ARE EMOTIONALLY ABUSED END UP SUFFERING WITH ATTACHMENT DISORDER.  THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING TODAY.  T

THIS IS A WIDELY UNTOUCHED  AND UNKNOWN PROBLEM TO MANY MAKING RESEARCH FOR IT RARE. 

SAMANTHA LEBOEUF/DAILY WISDOM WORDS

 

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FAILURE “WHEN YOUR BEST ISN’T GOOD ENOUGH”

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OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY IS FAILURE.  FAILURE HAPPENS AS A PART OF LIFE.  THERE ARE TIMES WHEN ALL SEEMS LOST AND WE BLAME OURSELVES FOR MISTAKES WE THINK WE MADE.  I WAT SO BADLY TO BE TREATED WELL.  I MADE A GENUINE EFFORT TO SEE MY DAUGHTER AND HER BEAUTIFUL KIDS.  LIFE IS SHORT, AND TO SPEND YOUR TIME ON SOMETHING THAT IS WORTH CHANGING AND HOW FAR YOU GO IS BASED ON HOW MUCH YOU CARE IN CORRECTING YOUR MISTAKE.  BEFORE GOING ANY FURTHER, LET’S TAKE A LOOK AT THE MEANING OF FAILURE IN OUR WEBSTER DICTIONARY AND THE DAILY WISDOM WORDS DEFINITION.   

WEBSTER DEFINITION OF FAILURE-AN UNEXPECTED PERSON, ENTERPRISE OR THING.  2.  THE OMISSION OF OF EXPECTED OR REQUIRED ACTION. 

DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION OF FAILURE-A LACK OF SUCCESS WHEN ATTEMPTING SOMETHING YOU MEAN TO HAVE THE OUTCOME OF SUCCESS. 

FAILURE IS A PART OF THE HUMAN AILMENT.  DESPITE HOW WE ALL FEEL WHEN WE FAIL, IT IS THE WAY WE LEARN.  UPON DOING SOMETHING INCORRECTLY, WE OFTEN RETHINK THE SITUATION AND TRY AGAIN DEPENDING ON OUR TENACITY.  WHEN WE RETRY THIS ATTRIBUTE, AND DO SUCCEED, NOT ONLY DO WE LEARN HOW TO LEARN HOW TO DO SOMETHING CORRECTLY, BUT LEARN FROM OUR FAILURE. 

HOWEVER, THERE ARE OTHER FACTORS INVOLVED WITH FAILURE AND WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DO FAIL BASED ON THE SCENARIO.  WE OFTEN DO WHAT I REFER TO AS THE “BLAME GAME”, BEATING OURSELVES UP WHEN WE ATTEMPT SOMETHING AND VIEW THE OUTCOME AS FAILURE, LEAVING ONLY ONE THING WE BLAME. 

IT IS NECESSARY TO FAIL SO WE CAN LEARN FROM OUR ATTEMPTS IN LIFE WITH ANY VENTURE, PERSONAL OR BUSINESS.  WE ARE ALL IMPERFECT HUMAN BEINGS AND THERE IS A FAILURE WHEN WE ATTEMPT SOMETHING WE FIND WE  ULTIMATELY AREN’T  SUCCESSFUL WITH.

THERE IS ANOTHER KIND OF FAILURE AND IT HURTS MORE THAN WHEN WE FAIL OURSELVES. IT IS THE FAILURE FOR THE CHOICES WE MAKE FOR ANOTHER PERSON.  WHEN THIS HAPPENS, WE HONESTLY GO THROUGH AN ANGER PROCESS WITH OURSELVES.  WE BLAME OURSELVES FOR THE FAILURE WHEN WE ARE SINCERELY TRYING TO ACHIEVE SOMETHING FOR SOMEONE WE DON’T SUCCEED WITH.  IT IS BEYOND SAD, TO BE THE PERSON WHO FAILS ANOTHER WHEN OUR INTENTIONS WERE ALTRUISTIC AND WE MADE THE NECESSARY EFFORT TO ACHIEVE IT.  ONE COMMON THING THAT OFTEN HAPPENS, IS FAILING OUR CHILDREN. 

AGAIN, NO MATTER HOW HARD WE TRY, DEPENDING ON ALL THE MOVING PARTS OF THE SITUATION, WE DROP THE BALL.  WITH SOME FAILURES, ALL WE CAN DO IS ACCEPT THE FAILURE WHEN NO MATTER WHAT WE TRY TO TO TO FIX THE MISTAKE ANOTHER MAKES ON OUR BEHALF LEAVING US  MISUNDERSTOOD AND JUDGED.  THESE MISTAKES OR FAILURES TRUSTING THE WRONG PERSON ARE OFTEN NOT ONLY REFLECT UPON OURSELVES BUT THE ONE(S) WE DISAPPOINTED. 

WHEN THIS HAPPENS, OUR FAILURE BECOMES AN HONEST MISTAKE TRUSTING THE WRONG PERSON.  IF YOU LOOK AT FAILURE, NO ONE STARTS OUT INTENDING TO FAIL.  THE FAILURE IS SOMEWHERE IN BETWEEN THE START OF A TASK OR DECISION AND THE SMALL DECISIONS WE MAKE IN BETWEEN THE FAILURE AND THEIR RAMIFICATIONS MADE IN BETWEEN.   “LIFE TELLS A STORY FOR ALL OF US AND IT IS THROUGH OUR SUCCESSES AND FAILURE WE TELL OUR OWN.”  SL. THANKS FOR READING.  SAMANTHA/DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM

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THIS IS WHY WE HAVE OVER 30 PAGES OF ONLINE SUPPORT WHETHER IT IS TO HELP YOU GET IN THE MOOD TO WRITE OR WATCH OR LISTEN TO A PODCAST OF WRITERS WHO ARE ALREADY A SUCCESS AND LISTENING TO THEM.  YOU CAN CONNECT WITH ANY OTHER WRITER BY SENDING A FRIEND REQUEST OR RECEIVING ONE AND OUR MINI-FACEBOOK APPLICATION ALLOWS YOU TO PRIVATELY COMMUNICATE WITH THEM. 

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INDEPENDENCE “ONE DAY A YEAR, OR 365 DAYS?”

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INDEPENDENCE IS OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY, THE FOURTH OF JULY OR “INDEPENDENCE DAY”IS ABOUT FREEDOM OF CHOICE AND INDEPENDENCE FROM DIVISION.  INDEPENDENCE IS CRUCIAL, AND EASY TO LOSE WHEN YOU’RE A COUNTRY, WORLD, OR JUST YOU.  I KNOW FROM A PERSON’S STANDPOINT HOW EASY YOU CAN LOSE YOUR OWN INDEPENDENCE.  NO ONE CAN TAKE FROM US WHAT IS OUR GOD GIVEN RIGHT;  BEING A FREE PERSON

WE HAVE TO “GIVE PERMISSION” FOR OUR POWER AS A COUNTRY OR AN INDIVIDUAL TO BE TAKEN AWAY WITHOUT FORCE.  WE HAVE THE ULTIMATE SAY IN THIS.  THE COUNTRY I LIVE IN, THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA IS SET UP FOR INDEPENDENCE AND SO ARE WE AS INDIVIDUALS.  SOMETIMES TAKING THE EASY WAY OUT, ALLOWING OTHERS TO BE IN CONTROL OF OUR COUNTRY OR OUR DESTINY AS AN INDIVIDUAL IS NOT THE BEST OR RIGHT WAY FOR US ALTHOUGH IT IS SOMETIMES THE EASIEST WAY.  TO HAVE THE POWER OF CHOICE, MEANS TAKING RESPONSIBILITY FOR ITS OUTCOME.  IT MAY SEEM EASIER TO LET OTHERS MAKE OUR DECISIONS FOR US, BUT THAT DOES NOT MAKE IT RIGHT. 

BECAUSE I HAVE SLOWLY WATCHED MY OWN INDEPENDENCE SLIP AWAY IN MANY CODEPENDENT RELATIONSHIPS, IS NOT THEIR ISSUE, IT IS MINE.  IT IS EASIER TO COUNT ON YOUR PARTNER TO MAKE DECISIONS ON THE DIFFICULTIES WE ALL ENCOUNTER IN LIFE.  TODAY REMINDS ME THAT IT IS SIMPLY NOT HEALTHY TO RELY ON OTHERS TO MAKE ALL MAJOR LIFE DECISIONS IF YOU ARE AN ADULT. 

BEFORE GOING ANY FURTHER, I WANT TO LOOK AT THE DEFINTION OF INDEPENDENCE IN OUR WEBSTER DICTIONARY AND ALSO THE DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION. 

WEBSTER DEFINITION OF INDEPENDENCE-THE FACT OR STATE OF BEING INDEPENDENT.   2.  FREE FROM OUTSIDE CONTROL, NOT DEPENDING ON ANOTHER’S AUTHORITY.  (OF A COUNTRY) SELF-GOVERNING. 

DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION-DEFINING WHO YOU ARE WITHOUT THE INFLUENCE OF ANYONE BUT YOURSELF.  2.  ACCEPTING THE RESPONSIBILITY AND REPERCUSSIONS OF MAKING DECISIONS AND THE CONSEQUENCES OF ITS RESULT. 

INDEPENDENCE DAY STARTED ON JULY 4TH, 1774 WHEN THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE WAS SIGNED AND EXECUTED.  “WE THE PEOPLE” IS HOW THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE STARTS IN ITS WORDING.  THERE IS NO “DIVISION”.  WE DON’T RECOGNIZE AT TIMES THIS FIRST SENTENCE.  THE FIRST SENTENCE OF THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE DOES NOT SAY, “WE, THE WHITE PEOPLE OR WE, THE BLACK PEOPLE”. 

“WE” MEANS IN THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE ALL OF US IN THE “UNITED STATES”.  WE LIVE IN A COUNTRY THAT IS DIVIDED AND IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN ABOUT BEING “UNITED, YET INDEPENDENT”.  WE HAVE THE FREEDOM TO MAKE OUR OWN CHOICES WITH OUR OWN VOICES”.  LET US THINK OF INDEPENDENCE DAY TODAY AS MORE THAN JUST FIREWORKS, MORE THAN JUST A HOLIDAY.  LET US ALL REMEMBER WE STAND FOR SOMETHING GREATER;  BEING INDEPENDENT FROM ONE ANOTHER, YET UNITED IN AN IMPORTANT CIVIL LIBERTY;  FREEDOM.  WE ALL NEED TO UNITE BUT IN THAT SAME CONCEPT, RESPECT OTHERS FOR THEIR INDEPENDENCE AND FREEDOM OF CHOICE. 

TODAY, LET US REMEMBER THIS AND RESPECT ONE ANOTHER AS THE INDIVIDUAL THEY ARE WHETHER WE AGREE WITH THEM OR NOT.  THE GREATEST RELATIONSHIP A COUNTRY HOLDS, IS THE HONOR OF RESPECTING DIFFERENCES WHILE HAVING A “UNITED FRONT”.  THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING TODAY AND HAVE A WONDERFUL FOURTH OF JULY AND INDEPENDENCE DAY. 

REMEMBER WE ARE ALL TOGETHER IN ONE WORLD, BUT INDEPENDENT FROM ONE ANOTHER IN OUR BELIEFS, DECISIONS AND CHOICES.  WE NEED TO HONOR THIS NOT ONLY FOR OUR COUNTRY, BUT FOR OURSELVES.  PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT, POEM OR OPINION BENEATH THIS POST WHERE YOU CAN BE THE ONE TO “JOIN THE DISCUSSION”, OR START ONE UP.  IT IS YOUR CHOICE AT THE END OF THE DAY.  IT IS, AFTERALL, OUR GOD GIVEN RIGHT AS A PERSON.

SAMANTHA LEBOEUF/FOUNDER-DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM

 

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SPARKLE

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TODAY OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD IS SPARKLE.  WHEN WE THINK OF SPARKLE, WE OFTEN THINK OF BLING.  WE THINK ABOUT SOMETHING BRIGHT AND SHINY HOWEVER, THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT CAN ALSO SPARKLE.   

I LOOK AT SPARKLE AS THE SHINE ONE HAS WHEN INTERACTING WITH OTHERS.  HAVE YOU EVER MET SOMEONE THAT HAS “SPARKLE” AS PART OF THEIR PERSONALITY?  THERE IS SOMETHING ABOUT THEM THAT DRAWS YOU TO THEM.  THEY HAVE WHAT I REFER TO AS THE PERSONALITY OF ONE WHO SPARKLES OR SHINES.  IT TAKES MORE THAN CHARISMA TO SPARKLE. 

I BELIEVE WHEN WE HAVE CHARISMA WE HAVE A PERSONALITY THAT IS MAGNETIC.  I BELIEVE THAT WHEN WE HAVE SPARKLE, OUR SOUL SHINES.  SPARKLE, AS I CALL IT, COMES WHEN YOU ARE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF.  IT IS SOMETHING WE OFTEN AREN’T AWARE OF, BECAUSE MOST PEOPLE AREN’T TRULY HAPPY.  WHEN WE SEE THOSE THAT SPARKLE, THEY ARE NOT JUST HAPPY IN THE MOMENT.  THEY ARE HAPPY DESPITE UPS AND DOWNS.  TRUE HAPPINESS SHINES LIKE A BEACON IN THE NIGHT, LIGHTING A PATH FOR OTHERS, SHINING  FROM THEIR BEING.   THIS IS THE DEFINITION I THINK OF WHEN ONE SPARKLES.  THEIR HAPPINESS SHINES FROM WITHIN.  THERE IS PROBABLY ONE TO TWO PEOPLE I HAVE MET OVER A LIFETIME THAT TRULY SHINES OR SPARKLES.   

THEY ARE THE ONES, DESPITE A RAINY DAY AND DREARY CLOUDS, WHO ARE HAPPY.  FOR THEM, THERE ARE NO BAD DAYS.  THERE ARE DAYS HOWEVER, THAT ARE FILLED WITH BAD EVENTS, BUT THAT IS WHEN ONE WHO HAS SPARKLE SHINES THE MOST.  THEY REACH OUT TO HELP OTHERS AND IT IS WITH THAT SPARKLE, THEY CAN HELP OTHERS WHEN THE DARKEST OF DAYS DAWN AS WE CONTINUE TO SEE IN THE PANDEMIC. 

THERE ARE SIMPLY THOSE THAT HAVE THE ABILITY TO STAY GROUNDED WITH GREAT DISPOSITION DESPITE WHAT GOES ON AROUND THEM.  THESE ARE THE INDIVIDUALS THAT TRULY SHINE.  THEY ARE THE ETERNAL OPTIMISTS FROM THE SOUL AND WILL ALWAYS “SPARKLE” DESPITE CIRCUMSTANCES, LIFE EVENTS OR TRAGEDY.  DO THEY EXPERIENCE SADNESS WE MAY ASK?  YES, BUT IT IS IN THEIR PERCEPTION WHAT MAKES THEM DIFFERENT.  THEY SHINE EVEN WHEN TRAGEDY STRIKES.  THEY HAVE THE STRANGE QUALITY OF SEEING THE HOPE IN WHAT APPEARS AS A HOPELESS SITUATION.  THEY CAN LITERALLY LIGHT ANOTHER’S INTERNAL CANDLE BY HELPING THEM SEE LIGHT IN THE DARKEST OF DAYS.  THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING TODAY. 

SAMANTHA LEBOEUF/DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM  

 

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TIES

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TODAY, OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD IS TIES.   OFTEN TIMES WE HEAR THE PHRASE, “THE TIES THAT BIND”.  OUR LIVES ARE FULL OF TIES, BOTH LITERAL AND METAPHORIC. AS THINGS UNFOLD IN OUR LIFE, SOMETIMES THESE TIES BREAK.  WHEN THIS HAPPENS, IT OFTEN IS FOR THE BEST.  IF YOU BELIEVE IN DESTINY, YOU MAY FIND THIS CONCEPT EASIER TO DIGEST.   

MY THOUGHTS ON THIS ARE ACCURATE FOR ME TO UNDERSTAND WHY CERTAIN THINGS HAPPEN IN LIFE THAT HURT. WE OFTEN DON’T REALIZE THIS UNTIL WE SEE WHERE OUR LIFE HAS GONE DOWN THE ROAD A BIT.  WE WILL THEN LOOK BACK AT THOSE BROKEN TIES AND REALIZE IT WAS NECESSARY FOR US TO BREAK THOSE PREVIOUS TIES IN ORDER TO TIE OUR SHOES AGAIN IN OUR PRESENT CIRCUMSTANCES. I BELIEVE LIFE  WORKS THIS WAY TODAY. 

I AM NOT A PSYCHIATRIST.  LOOKING BACK, WHEN I WAS IN COLLEGE, I LOVED DIFFERENT KINDS OF MENTAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL COURSES. I CREATED THEORIES LIKE THIS:  TIES SHOULD ONLY BE KNOTTED AGAIN IF WE “FIT” IN THE CURRENT SHOES LIFE IS ASKING US TO WEAR AND LACE UP OR TIE OR GOD IS.  I OFTEN HAVE WHAT I CALL, AN “AH HA” MOMENT AND REMEMBER WHERE I’VE ONCE BEEN AND THE NECESSITY TO EXPERIENCE THE FEELINGS HAD DURING EVENTS WE’VE EXPERIENCED IN THE PAST. 

THESE ARE THE PAST EVENTS WE EXPERIENCED, WHICH LEAD TO US TAKING THE NEXT STEP IN KNOWLEDGE.  BECAUSE OF THESE EVENTS, WE FINALLY UNDERSTAND WHY WE’VE EXPERIENCED WHATEVER WE DID TO GET  TO THIS NEW STEP EXPERIENCED IN THE PAST.  WE EVOLVE, ESPECIALLY WITH EMOTIONS, AND TIES ARE ALMOST ALWAYS CONNECTING THIS KNOWLEDGE TOGETHER. 

LET US TAKE A LOOK AT THE DEFINITION OF TIES THAT APPLY TO THIS POST FROM OUR WEBSTER DICTIONARY AND OUR DAILY WISDOM WORDS MEANING.  1.  TO BRING TOGETHER IN RELATIONSHIP, CONNECT OE UNITE.  FRIENDS WHO WERE TIED TO COMMON INTERESTS.  2.  PEOPLE WHO ARE TIED BY BLOOD OR MARRIAGE. 

DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION-A BASE OF KNOWLEDGE THAT TIES ANOTHER MORE DEFINED PIECE OF LEARNING ONCE WE LEARN THIS BASE.  THESE TIES ARE PART OF A GENERAL PROCESS OR SPECIFIC AREA OF KNOWLEDGE.  TIES ARE AND ALWAYS WILL BE AN IMPORTANT DAILY WISDOM WORDS DEFINITION. 

TIES CAN REPRESENT TIES THAT ARE A PART OF THE STRONGEST RELATIONSHIPS IN LIFE WE WILL EVER HAVE.  TIES ARE A PART OF COMMITMENT OR A COMMITMENT TO LEARN AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE ABOUT OURSELVES AND TAKE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO US, TO LEARN AS MUCH AS WE CAN IN OUR LIFE COMMITMENT TO LEARN AS MUCH AS WE CAN IN ALL AREAS OF KNOWLEDGE TAKING THE  TIME AND COMMITMENT WITH OUR OWN INTERNAL TIES.  ONE BASE OF KNOWLEDGE TAKES US TO ANOTHER, MORE COMPLICATED KNOWLEDGE AND WITH COMMITMENT, THE TIES CREATED OVER TIME ALLOW US TO BECOME AN EXPERT. 

THANKS FOR READING ABOUT TIES.  HAVE A BLESSED DAY.  DON’T FORGET TO WATCH THE SECOND EPISODE OF OUR NEW DAILY WISDOM WORDS PODCAST AT 9:00 AM PACIFIC TIME, WITH OUR GUEST CATHY MELLON WHO IS SHARING WITH US ON THE SHOW TODAY, PART ONE OF CHILD TRAUMA AND ABUSE, ALSO AUTHOR OF “A SURVIVOR’S MIND”.  NOTE:  (*WE WARN YOU AHEAD OF TIME OF SENSITIVE CONTENT LIKELY TO BE TOO GRAPHIC FOR SMALL CHILDREN CREATING FEAR AND DISMAY.) 

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JOIN NOW IF YOU WISH OR WANT TO ACTIVELY BECOMING A SUCCESSFUL WRITER USING EACH TIE AND BOND CREATED, TO MAKE YOU STRONGER!  POST ON OUR COMMUNITY WRITER’S PAGES YOUR POETRY, COMMENTS, AND SHARE ON OUR DAILY WISDOM WORDS BLOG, AS WELL AS OUR MUSIC AND POETRY PROMPTS!!  HAVE A GREAT DAY.  PLEASE WATCH OUR PODCAST AND LISTEN TO A TRUE LIFE ACCOUNT OF A SURVIVOR OF SEVERE CHILD ABUSE WHO CAME OUT ON TOP!!  CATHERINE MELLON IS ALSO A DAILY WISDOM WORD MEMBER AND AUTHOR OF 11 SURVIVOR OF ABUSE BOOKS.  COMMENT ON THE PODCAST PAGE.  THANK YOU AGAIN!  DON’T FORGET TO DONATE ON OUR DONATION PAGE!  YOUR MONEY GOES TOWARDS A GREATER CAUSE-LITERATURE, WITH PORTIONS DONATED TO UNICEF FOR CHILDREN!  Samantha

QUIRKS “WE ALL HAVE THEM”

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QUIRKS WILL BE OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY.  WE ALL HAVE THOSE “QUIRKS” WHICH MAKE US UNIQUE AND SPECIAL.  THESE QUIRKS AREN’T PERSONALITY FLAWS AS WE MAY THINK.  THEY ARE THE INTRIGUING PART OF WHO WE ARE.  BEFORE GOING ANY FURTHER, LET US TAKE A LOOK AT THE MEANING OF QUIRKS IN OUR WEBSTER DICTIONARY AND OF COURSE,  OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD MEANING FOR QUIRKS. 

WEBSTER DICTIONARY MEANING OF QUIRKS-1.  A PECULIAR BEHAVIORAL HABIT.  A STRANGE CHANCE OCCURRENCE. 

DAILY WISDOM WORD MEANING OF QUIRKS-SOMETHING UNIQUE ABOUT US THAN MAKES US WHO WE ARE. 

DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR QUIRKS ARE THAT MAKE YOU WHO YOU ARE, UNIQUELY EXPRESSED THROUGH YOUR PERSONALITY?  I KNOW I HAVE QUIRKS.  FOR EXAMPLE, SOMETIMES WHEN DOING THE HOUSEWORK, I WILL BREAK THE REGIMENTATION UP WITH THE SPECIFIC THINGS NEEDED TO BE DONE AND START ONE STEP OF ONE CHORE, AND TWO STEPS OF ANOTHER, AND ANOTHER.   ODD?  YES, BUT IT IS NOT THE TYPICAL WAY OF PEOPLE DO THEM.  QUIRKS CAN BE LOOKED AT IN TWO DIFFERENT WAYS.  WE CAN LOOK AT THEM THROUGH THE EYES OF “THOSE QUALITIES THAT MAKE US UNIQUE, DIFFERENT AND SPECIAL OR WE CAN SEE THEM AS FLAWS. 

THE CHOICE IS OURS BUT PERSONALLY I LIKE TO VIEW MY QUIRKS AS WHAT MAKES ME WHO I AM IN AS POSITIVE LIGHT AS POSSIBLE.  I AM ALWAYS SETTING MYSELF UP FOR CHALLENGES AND OFTEN WANT TO MAKE PEOPLE LAUGH EVEN THOUGH OFTEN, MY JOKES SIMPLY ARE NOT THAT FUNNY.  MY SON ALSO HAS QUIRKS WITH THE FIRST THING COMING TO MIND HIS UNIQUE AND OFTEN SARCASTIC SENSE OF HUMOR. 

WE CAN TRULY VIEW THESE THINGS ABOUT OURSELVES AS WEIRD, STRANGE THINGS ABOUT OURSELVES OR WE CAN LOOK AT THEM AS POSITIVES.  THE CHOICE IS OURS.  BY THE WAY, ONE OF THE REASON I CHOSE QUIRKS AS OUR DAILY WISDOM WORD TODAY IS BECAUSE OF THE POINT I JUST MADE ABOUT IT BEING OUR CHOICE AS TO HOW WE VIEW OUR QUIRKS.  THIS IS ALSO TRUE WITH MANY OTHER THINGS IN LIFE.  WE HAVE A CHOICE AS TO HOW WE VIEW THINGS.  WE CAN SEE OUR QUIRKS AS STRANGE AND WEIRD OR UNIQUE QUALITIES THAT MAKE US WHO WE ARE.  WE HAVE THE CHOICE TO SEE EVERYTHING AS A POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE.  OFTEN TIMES WE THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS OUT OF OUR CONTROL. 

THE ONE THING THAT WE CAN CONTROL IS THE CHOICE WE MAKE WITH THE PERSPECTIVES ON HOW WE SEE THINGS.  

THANK YOU FOR READING TODAY!!  SAMANTHA 

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SHALLOWNESS

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HOW DOES IT FEEL TO COPE WITH SHALLOWNESS?  WHEN SOMEONE IS SHALLOW, THEY ARE OFTEN NARCISSISTIC.  HOWEVER, IT IS NOT ALWAYS THE TRUTH THAT SHALLOWNESS IS INDICATIVE OF NARCISSISM.  SOMETIMES, A PERSON CAN’T COPE WITH DEVELOPMENT DISORDER.  THEY PERHAPS HAVE BEEN THROUGH PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL ABUSE THROUGH COUNSELING OR PSYCHIATRIC OR MENTAL HELP.  IF THEY DON’T GET THIS KIND OF HELP OR THE HELP THEY DO GET ISN’T EFFECTIVE, THEY END UP HAVING TO BUILD COPING MECHANISMS.

 YOU MEET THESE INDIVIDUALS AND THEY ARE OFTEN SUCCESSFUL IN A FINANCIAL SENSE BUT THEY ARE UNABLE TO MAKE EMOTIONAL COMMITMENTS.  IN FACT, THEY HAVE DEVELOPED MECHANISMS TO COPE WITH EMOTIONS AND THAT IS TO CONTROL HOW THEY FEEL.  EVEN WHEN THEY DO FALL “IN LOVE” OR FEEL SOMETHING VERY CLOSE TO LOVE, THEY WILL NOT ALLOW THEMSELVES TO FEEL ANYTHING CLOSE TO COMMITMENT.  THEY MAY BE PERFECTLY LOYAL AND PRIDE THEMSELVES ON THIS, THEY FIND THEY CANNOT GO FURTHER!

IF YOU ARE THE ONE WHO FALLS “IN LOVE” WITH SOMEONE WHO IS SHALLOW, THEY SIMPLY ARE INCAPABLE OF TAKING THE RELATIONSHIP FURTHER.  IT IS EXTREMELY HURTFUL TO THE ONE THEY HAVE BEEN INVOLVED WITH, BECAUSE THEY ARE LED TO BELIEVE THROUGH THE PERSON’S WORDS THAT THEY CAN MOVE FORWARD LIKE ANY OTHER PERSON.  HOW DO I KNOW THIS, YOU MAY WONDER?  I HAD A RELATIONSHIP BASED ON SHALLOWNESS.  IT SEEMED LIKE I WAS HEARING AND FEELING THINGS FROM THIS MAN, BUT WHEN THE TIME CAME AFTER THREE YEARS AND MANY LIES OR UNTRUTHS, HE COULDN’T TAKE THE RELATIONSHIP FURTHER, HE WAS UNABLE TO.

AFTER HEARING THAT HE LOVED ME, EVEN TAKING IT TO TALKS OF ENGAGEMENT, I KNEW THAT HIS WORDS WERE THE ONLY THING I WOULD EVER HEAR, NOT WEDDING BELLS.  LET US TAKE A LOOK AT THE MEANING OF SHALLOWNESS IN OUR WEBSTER DICTIONARY THAT APPLIES TO WHAT MY MESSAGE IS AND THE DAILY WISDOM WORDS MEANING. 

WEBSTER MEANING OF SHALLOWNESS.  1.  A LACK OF PHYSICAL DEPTH.  LACK OF STRENGTH OR INTENSITY. 

DAILY WISDOM WORDS DEFINITION OF SHALLOWNESS-LACKING IN DEPTH AND EMOTIONAL CAPACITY BUT NOT TO THE DEGREE OF NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER.  YOU COULD POSSIBLY GET INVOLVED WITH SOMEONE WHO IS SHALLOW AS WELL.

  BE CAREFUL TO WATCH FOR WORDS VERSES ACTION FROM THEM.  OFTENTIMES THESE INDIVIDUALS DO NOT MEAN TO BE HURTFUL.  THEY TRULY “BELIEVE” THEY CAN FOLLOW THROUGH WITH THE RELATIONSHIP AND FEEL SOMETHING CLOSE TO LOVE.  SADLY, WE WANT THIS TO BE TRUE BECAUSE OUR FEELINGS ARE BASED ON DEPTH.  THESE INDIVIDUALS KNOW DEEP INSIDE THEY CAN’T GO TO THE LEVEL OF LOVE YOU ARE CAPABLE OF.  I WISH THEY COULD TOO.  WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM WAS SO HURTFUL, THEY CAN’T GO TO THE LEVEL OF EMOTIONS NECESSARY FOR LONG-TERM  RELATIONSHIPS LEADING TO LIFETIME COMMITMENT.  WE CANNOT MAKE  OTHERS FEEL TO THE DEPTH WE DO, AND WE CAN’T FIX THE DAMAGE DONE FROM CHILDHOOD ON.  THANKS FOR READING….

SAMANTHA LEBOEUF

***THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING TODAY.  LEAVE COMMENTS WHERE YOU SEE THE JOIN THE DISCUSSION AREA JUST BELOW THIS IN THE “JOIN THE DISCUSSION” AREA.  ARE YOU A WRITER?  PERHAPS YOU SHOULD JOIN DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM.  WE ARE AN INTERNATIONAL WRITER’S COMMUNITY THAT LOVES OUR WRITERS.  WE OFFER YOU MORE THAN YOU KNOW THROUGH OUR WRITING EXERCISES, DAILY, OUR MUSIC PROMPTS, AND SO MUCH MORE.  YOU WILL HAVE YOUR OWN COMMUNITY WRITING PAGE.  THIS IS A WONDERFUL PLACE TO HAVE AS MUCH OR LITTLE PRIVACY AS ONE WANTS.  IT IS ALSO A WAY TO EXPRESS YOURSELF TO SOCIAL MEDIA OF TWITTER, FACEBOOK AND YOU CAN POST FROM OUR WEBSITE WITH THE MINI-FACEBOOK APPLICATION THAT IS PART OF YOUR LIFETIME MEMBERSHIP.  WE WOULD LOVE TO HAVE YOU SIGN UP WHEN VISITING OUR WEBSITE.  THANKS SO MUCH, JUST $10 GETS YOU A LIFETIME MEMBERSHIP.  THANKS SO MUCH, SAMANTHA

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TEARS “Why we have tears when we cry”

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When we see someone cry, and their tears falling, we feel bad for them.  Our first instinct is to comfort them.  What we don’t realize is often they need to cry and their tears cleanse the soul.  When I cry, of course I feel sad, but never did I realize that to cry is part of a healing process.  I lost someone so dear to me, my sister.  I watched my nieces, her children hurt and cry. 

Her youngest daughter Luma is 22, and someone who I have always been close with.  There is something about Luma that makes her special.  She illuminates a light with whoever she is around.  When she feels someone else is hurting, she is the first one to offer a comforting shoulder.  Her mother was an angel.  I know we often hear this from loved ones but in all reality, she really was.  She gave so much to those she loved and touched many lives. 

Luma and I have always held a special bond.  Luma has class.  She doesn’t believe it, but I see it.  She also took her mother’s death so hard.  For many months, I hardly heard from her.  She even wondered if I did not have the best of intentions for her.  I always have, and I always will.  Although I could not see her as she lived in another state, I felt her anger.  If she had been thinking clearly, she would have known I would never have any malice or anything but love for her and would only think of her best interest.  It took many months, and a move to Mexico, for her to be able to cry. 

I have her visiting now, and we share tears together.  She is amazing and such a loving person.  For anyone who has this kind of illuminating  light, there sometimes is darkness too.  When she is hurting and depressed she ia a lot like me.  She wants to be alone or escape the pain.  She is very strong but part of grieving is sadness and tears. The definition of tears in our Webster Dictionary are-1.   The state or action of crying.  a drop of salty liquid secreted from ones glands when their eyes are irritated.  Daily Wisdom Word Definition of Tears-a way for the human body to express sadness and cleanse the soul by crying.  Crying can be a very good thing.  When we grieve, we need to cry.  We can’t hide from grief. 

What we can do is bury it and this will eventually catch up to us in some way.  for those things we don’t cope with, we develop fear from.  Fear is part of burying emotions that one doesn’t process.  Anger is another way that we express buried grief. Allow yourself to cry when you feel sad.  Sometimes it takes a good, healthy cry to cleanse our soul. Often times, by crying, we release the pent up emotion.  Everything we experience in life, we must deal with.  Crying is good for the soul and the tears that fall, cleanse our soul.  My niece is now back with me.  She of course has moments and days of sadness but she allows herself to cry. 

She is Il-LUMA-nation and light.  I love her like my own child and I feel honored to be in her life again.  It is what my sister would have wanted.  Thank you for reading….Samantha/Founder, Daily

 

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YEARNINGS

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HAVE YOU EVER FELT THE YEARNING OF MISSING SOMEONE?  YEARNING IS HARD TO DEAL WITH, HOWEVER IT IS A PART OF LIFE.  LOSS OF ONE YOU LOVE IS NEVER EASY.  IT IS ALSO SO DIFFICULT WHEN YOU YEARN AND DESIRE SOMEONE WHO IS A PART OF YOUR PAST. 

SOMETIMES I HAVE YEARNINGS TO SEE MY LITTLE SISTER, AND THEY PHYSICALLY HURT MY HEART.  I SOMETIMES BELIEVE AS I GET OLDER THAT LIFE SOMETIMES IS A TRADE-OFF.  IT IS NEVER EVER GOING TO BE PERFECT AND WE MAKE TRADEOFFS.  I BELIEVE THAT AS YOU GET OLDER YOUR CHOICES ARE FEWER AND FURTHER IN BETWEEN. 

I LOOK AT MY PAST AND ALL OF THE PEOPLE I ONCE KNEW THAT PLAYED SUCH INTEGRAL, SIGNIFICANT ROLES IN MY LIFE.  SOME OF THE PEOPLE I MISS, REMAIN A PART OF THE PAST.  I CLEARLY CAN SEE THAT THEY BELONG IN THE PAST AND FOR GOOD REASON.  PAIN WAS LEFT BEHIND AND LESSONS BROUGHT FORWARD.  IT TRULY IS SAD THOUGH WHEN WE DO YEARN AND MISS SOMEONE FROM OUR PAST.  THERE ARE A FEW KEY INDIVIDUALS THAT REMAIN ON MY MIND OCCASIONALLY BECAUSE I WAS SURE WE WERE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER.  I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY THEY MUST BE PART OF MY PAST. 

THIS IS WHERE FAITH HAS TO COME IN PLAY.  I KNOW THAT THE RELATIONSHIPS HAVE BEEN LEFT IN THE PAST FOR GOOD REASON.  YET, THERE ARE STILL YEARNINGS SOMETIMES TO “CONNECT” WITH THE PAST AND THE MEMORIES I MADE WITH THESE INDIVIDUALS ARE SO HARD AND PAINFUL TO LEAVE BEHIND.  LET US TAKE A LOOK AT THE WEBSTER MEANING OF YEARNINGS AND THE DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION. 

WEBSTER DEFINITION OF YEARNING-1.  TO WANT SOMETHING STRONGLY.  2.  TO HAVE A STRONG, OFTEN SAD LONGING.

DAILY WISDOM WORD DEFINITION:  TO FEEL PITY OR SYMPATHY OR SORRY FOR YOURSELF WHEN YOU CAN’T SEE SOMEONE YOU MISS. 

THERE ARE THOSE INDIVIDUALS THAT BLEND INTO THE PAST AND THEN THERE ARE THOSE WE HAVE A HARDER TIME LEAVING IN THE PAST.  WHEN WE THINK OF MEMORIES OF THE PAST, WE CAN STILL REMEMBER THE SOUND OF THEIR VOICE, THE WAY THEY SMELLED, DRESSED, ACTED TOWARDS US, AND IT ALL SEEMS LIKE A DREAM OF PERFECTION.  HOWEVER, IN REALITY, NO MATTER HOW MUCH WE MAY MISS, AND PHYSICALLY “HURT” WHEN WE THINK OF THOSE WE YEARN FOR, THEY ARE IN OUR PAST FOR A REASON.  THEY KNOW THIS TOO IN THEIR OWN WAY, WHICH IS WHY YOU DON’T OFTEN HEAR FROM THE ONES WE YEARN FOR.  TO YEARN FOR MEANS TO STILL DESIRE. 

YES I HAVE HAD THESE FEELINGS SO INTENSELY THEY HAVE CAUSED ME TO CRY IN MISERY THAT THEY MUST REMAIN WHERE THEY ARE NOW.  JUST AS OUR LIFE GOES ON, SO DOES THEIRS.  OUR LESSON IN ALL OF THIS IS TO ACCEPT THOSE WE YEARN FOR THAT WE AREN’T WITH AS FATE WATCHING OUR BACK, BUT THERE ARE STILL THOSE THAT ARE GONE FOR REASONS NEVER UNDERSTOOD.  THANKS FOR READING ABOUT YEARNINGS TODAY.  WE ALSO YEARN FOR THOSE WE LOSE TO DEATH BUT WE MUST BELIEVE IT WAS THEIR TIME TO GO, AND THEY DID NOT LEAVE BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO.  HAVE A BLESSED DAY.  SAMANTHA

 

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LOOK FOR THE FIRST EPISODE OF OUR DAILY WISDOM WORDS PODCAST WHICH WILL AIR 6/12//2027 9:00 AM PACIFIC TIME!!!!  OUR FIRST GUEST IS:  DR. KELLY SULLIVAN WALDEN, A LICENSED HYPNOTHERAPIST AND DREAM SPECIALIST, AKA “DR. DREAM”.   SHE IS ALSO AUTHOR OF SEVERAL BEST SELLING BOOKS INCLUDING CO-AUTHOR, CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE SOUL.  HOSTED BY: REENIE REID, NEED TRIVEDI, AND PRODUCED BY MONDAY ABUH….”ANOTHER DAILY WISDOM WORDS PRODUCTION!!!!

WHY SHOULD I JOIN DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM AKA DAILY WISDOM WORDS, LLC

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DO YOU BELONG TO  A WRITER’S COMMUNITY?  DAILY WISDOM WORDS IS A WRITER’S WEBSITE DESIGNED FOR ALL WRITERS.  IT IS THE WEBSITE MANY SIGN UP FOR THEIR PRIVACY.  EACH NEW MEMBER RECEIVES THEIR OWN SOCIAL MEDIA PROFILE PAGE WHERE THEY CAN SHOW OFF THEIR WORK!! 

THIS ALLOWS YOU TO SEND/RECEIVE FRIEND REQUESTS, COMMUNICATE PRIVATELY WITH OTHER AUTHORS, POETS OR CREATIVE WRITER’S MAKING GREAT CONTACTS.  WE WANT YOU TO SUCCEED AND GIVE YOU EVERY TOOL AND FORMAT TO DO SO!  WE BELIEVE WITHOUT THE PROPER TOOLS, AND A HEALTHY MINDSET, IT IS EITHER VERY DIFFICULT OR IMPOSSIBLE TO GIVE YOUR BEST AS A WRITER AND PERSON.  THIS IS WHAT WE GIVE YOU AT DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM.  YOU GET ALL OF THE TOOLS YOU NEED TO TAKE YOUR WRITING WHERE YOU WANT TO GO.  NEED SOMETHING LIKE A BOOK REVIEW, OR COVER?  CHECK OUT OUR WEBSITE AND VISIT OUR ONLINE STORE.  WE OFFER GIFT MEMBERSHIPS AND SO MUCH MORE. 

PERHAPS YOU HAVE WRITTEN SOMETHING SPECIAL AND WISH IT TO BE FRAMED AND SCROLLED ON A SPECIFIC PAGE DESIGN OR SIZE.  DWW HAS PARTNERED WITH CHATTERBOX WALLS, THE MOST EXCEPTIONAL FRAMING/CHOICE IN ART YOU WRITE AND YOU GET TO CHOOSE ALL THE OPTIONS DIRECTLY FROM. OUR STORE BY LOOKING FOR CUSTOM POETRY WHICH WE CAN ALSO WRITE FOR YOU. 

IF YOU HAVE YOUR OWN WRITING YOU WANT FRAMED AND DESIGNED ESPECIALLY FOR SOMEONE, THEN USE OUR WEBSITE TO ORDER.  DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM HAS SECURED A BETTER PRICE TO YOU AS A MEMBER OF THIS INTERNATIONAL WRITING COMMUNITY.  WE OFFER DAILY LIVE PROMPTS WITH LIVE FEEDBACK FROM OUR HOST, HAVE A PODCAST COMING JUNE 12TH YOU COULD EVEN BE A GUEST ON.  CHECK OUT OUR EXCEPTIONAL BOOK REVIEWS WRITTEN AFTER READING EVERY WORD OF WHAT YOU HAVE WRITTEN WITH CARE. 

VISIT OUR WEBSITE TO ORDER AT DAILYWISDOMWORDS.COM/WISE-REVIEWS AND ORDER ONE FOR HALF THE COST OF OTHER BOOK REVIEWS AND TWICE THE QUALITY!  YOU WILL BE AMAZED WHAT WE DO INCLUDING ARTICLES OF POSITIVITY AND INSIGHT ON OUR #WISDOMOLOGY PAGE, DAILY WISDOM WORDS BLOG PAGE, AND LITERATURE AND WRITING TIPS FROM AWARD WINNING WRITER, SHIRLEY SATTERFIELD EVERY SATURDAY!  LIVE PROMPTS WITH HOST TO COMMENT,  CASH POETRY CONTESTS, COMMUNITY WRITER’S PAGE, AND SO MUCH MORE…

STARTING JUNE 12TH 2027, JOIN HOST, NEEL TRIVEDI AND CO-HOST, REENIE O’DEA FOR OUR VERY OWN DAILY WISDOM WORDS #PODCAST AVAILABLE ON SPOTIFY, GOOGLE PODCAST AND ANCHOR!  THIS WILL BE AIRING EVERY SATURDAY AT 9:00 AM PACIFIC STANDARD TIME!!  WE WILL HAVE FASCINATING GUESTS AND GIVE -AWAYS , WITH OUR FIRST GUEST BEING MS. KELLY SULLIVAN WALDEN, DREAM SPECIALIST, HYPNO THERAPIST, AND HER NEW DREAM CARDS!  SHE CO-AUTHORED “CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE SOUL”, AND SEVEN BOOKS PUBLISHED!  YOU MAY HAVE SEEN HER ON THE RACHAEL RAY SHOW, DR. PHIL SHOW ALREADY AND KNOW JUST HOW LUCKY WE ARE TO HAVE HER!!!  to join, visit our website now or just $100 and get a LIFETIME membership!.  “”We give you the tools you need to make you writing dreams come true”